5.5 – Idiot food and Rufus self-sabotaging

(brings hands together)

Hello

Idanezys

I’m back

get your butts ready

for your FREEDOM IS OVER

Grilled: I smell something on the lawn

your MASTER HAS COME BACK

Diana: I’ll stop you right there love, we all know this isn’t your show

Oh hi Diana

Just catching up it’s been like a-

Diana: Yes we’re used to that.

Diana: I’ll catch you up. My husband Rufus cheated on me. Now I’m going to make him regret it.

Elly: (*in the bg loudly slurping plasma juice through her eyeball*)

This save took so long to load you wouldn’t believe it Diana

Diana: I smell something nasty coming down the stairs

Egbert: … (smells his own armpit)

Like I have all this upgraded computer gear and STILL you Idanezys are just so fat

Diana: (nose twitch) Figures

Rufus: …

I wanted to say sorry Diana for taking so much time to get back to y’all, I was doing this thing with store content-

Rufus: (casually walks by to go take a shower)

Diana: I hate that he has a nice tush. Alright, here’s the plan listen close. You gave me a year to think about it.

Elly: We have so many boxes, what is up with this.

Diana: We’re going to give him AMPLE WAYS TO kill himself (evil glow intensifies)

Eyda: Hey ma, what’s going on

Elly: What about drowning, didn’t aunt Diella die that way

It was tragic, I threw a fit

Diana: Are you listening?

YES I AM HELLO

hey Erika- I mean Esme

Esme: Yeah nice save

Diana: (rolls her eyes) (grabs me to build mode)

Diana: So yes, since you can’t control me or him you’re going to build a trap. Right on this plot of land

(nodding along as i am manhandled)

(a few moments later)

DONE ITS DONE

Diana: Give them the tour

So I present to you a bachelor pad

You’ve got your murphy bed, equipped to kill you

You have a mummy in a sarcophagus also equipped to kill you

and finally you have the door of life and death where death can come for you too!

This may or may not work, we’ll have to see if he bites the BAIT

We just have a little more to prep…

making sure he KNOWS this is his bed

Annnnnnnnnd limiting the amount of people allowed into the building

THE TRAP IS SET

ALRIGHT (clears throat)

WELCOME BACK GUYS

IT’S BEEN A WHILE SO HAVE A RECAP.

This is one of our torch holders

Elly : Hey what’s up

That’s the OTHER HALF of the torch holders. They be twins

Eyda : DAD REALLY. First you cause trouble by CHEATING ON MOM WITH LILIPAD and now you steal the shower? Rude

Rufus: (continues to be obstinately be silent)

I can only control one twin at a time and I switch at midnight. And currently we’re on ELLY.

They’ve got FIVE older siblings, two (Enzo and Emma) of which have already moved out and three to go.

The two next ones are the twins, of which Esme is half

and for some REASON hates her mom more than her dad???

which i think has just always been a thing

the TWIN ABOUT TO GET SCARED over there is Erika

Mah monkey twins, they got 3 days before they ADULT up and move out

Bbee: 34 WOODEN FORKS

Erika: FU—AHH

Lolololol

AND FINALLY EGBERT

THE BEAUT WANNA BE ASTRONAUNT

Egbert: I’m lost

and the horse Orion in the bg and……………..

YOU.

Lilipad: (happy clapping)

I swear this robot has bugged out on me, BROKEN my hot tub, and now BROKEN my ex-torch holder’s RELATIONSHIP

Lilipad: I was always meant to be the mother of this family. 😀

I SHOULD’VE SEEN THIS COMING.

You’re building up to be on my top hated beside Bunny

ELLY DO SOME HOMEWORK as I watch everyone else

Elly: God this place is SUCH A mess.

You can clean it up if you want

Elly: I’m ROYALTY. I shouldn’t have to clean this up.

Elly: (puts down homework. It disappears and she smiles)

Ah

fuck

lol you mean i didn’t fix this a year ago?

I REMEMBER THIS WORKING

SO DRAG ESME INTO IT

she seemed lost

SO THAT DIDN’T WORK

STILL DISAPPEARING

So I’m – I’m

So I did some testing and discovered it was my fault

Turns out one of my custom personal scripts was somehow messing with this???

ANYWAY FIXED

Elly: I have to do this now?

yesh

Just in time for me to slam my head on my desk as EGBERT JUST

went in there

for funsies

even though I locked the DOOR on him

EGGIE BOY

Egbert: What I’m going to sleep you should be proud

Oh no mummy?

Huh

Weird

Of course Lilipad goes in OF COURSE

This murder trap isn’t going so well Diana

Diana: Patience

ur son is too dumb

Diana: Watch it

BUT WHO KNOWS WHICH I WAS TALKING ABOUT

CAUSE HERE’S ANOTHER ONE

lmao who apparently put himself in a sketchy place

awwwwwwwww

Grilled cheese is looking out the window

I didn’t know doggies could do this that’s socute

Elly: I finished my homework by the way. IF THAT INTERESTS YOU.

It do cause you’ve apparently got a wish to hang out with your twin and that’s real cute

I support it

let’s ignore that stupid wish to best friend your dad for now

Look at THIS GAL

She cleaned herself and is now POOPING

good for YOU

Eyda: plumbob help me this toilet is DISGUSTING

ah good ole’ idanezy faces

EXCUSE ME WHAT

Lilipad : What

you know how to use this???

I don’t even have time to say I’m bored that BBEE is off to do shit

Bbee : I aim to please

yes good Rufus close the bed while I just do a thing

Rufus : >_>

The frame rate lowered

but I’m sure ALL IS FINE

YOOOO HEY MUMMY

Mummy : wat

I DIG your eyeballs

This is an INGAME OPTION? I have to g o s e e

The game PREVENTS ME FROM OPENING YOU IN CAS

also that’s a hell of a name

that I’m not going to remember

please curse Rufus thnks

Lol

He’s being preyed on by two, I’m here for it

Mummy : HUG TIME

Rufus : fu-

Bbee : Wow way to steal my thunder. Imma go see what Lilipad is up to

Isn’t there supposed to be a

cursed moodlet or something

…

HA

GASP

YOU’RE SKILLING

PAINTING

I was just complaining that everything was taking FOREVER to render

At least free will is doing GREAT

Talk about a commitment to the bit

waiting for her to charge up before doing the scare lol

Bbee: heY HOMEWRECKER

Lilipad: I wonder what my soulmate is doing

Rufus: (thinking about skipping town with Orion)

Just Rufus making more enemies on his own

Orion: DON’T COME CLOSER. I AM LOYAL TO DIANA.

Rufus: (rolls eyes)

MEANWHILE ELLY IS

HEARTFARTING SOMEONE

They in class though so I gotta waiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit

At the risk of sounding like an old grandma

WHAT BOUT BABIES

Look who I caught

in the goddamn

action of it

Bbee: HAHA THE TWO HATED AT IT AGAIN

I’m starting to love you Bbee lmao

CAKE OR DRY FOOD

oh what a hard choice

Mac: Idiot food, or good cat food?

You make a good point

I gotta say though

This is the only way my sims seem to figure out

they’re being cheated on

through the RUMORS

Diana: ARE YOU FOR REAL? I’M GOING TO BURN YOU AS YOU SLEEP

Rufus: Haha hacky sack

Bbee: It’s so fun to play with a deadman

WHO AM I TO STOP YOU

HAVE FUN

you TOO?

Esme: I’m not into the whole… be in that house thing

lol alright have fun

WHY IS EVERYONE RUNNING AWAY

Eyda: It’s political on my part

I SHOULD’VE SAID NO

Esme: Haha oops you saw that anyways huh?

-5

Ahhh

routing

love it

Eyda: Why are my siblings such idiots AND in the way

(game might’ve crashed at kids out of school)

Only lost a few hours in the game CAUSE I SAVE NOW

Also apparently this dude’s been an adult?

WHEN DID HE GROW UP?

Who knows lmao

NICE TRY

You don’t get points for that

PLZ calm I JUST pressed play

WHATEVER you were doing

you’re clearly off to make yourself forgiven

Bbee : (smirks)

My gods guys

it’s like I keep forgetting how broken this save is lol

over here having a

Ah the accumulating script errors

Elly : (comes running over even tho school is still in session as if her ass is on fire)

WHAT

WHAT WARRANTS LEAVING SCHOOL

Elly : ORION i’M HERE TO SAVE YOU

are u for real

Orion : It’s comfort food for the something that clearly died on my back

Elly : There you go, I’m the best

Orion : Thank you

yeah yeah stop being pretty GO TO SCHOOL

AW SHIT LOOK

PUPPY BRINGING THE NEWSPAPER

the animals are the only ones slightly sane in this household thats right

Grilled : Am good puppy yes?

NO YOU GAVE IT TO LILIPAD

Lilipad : The best puppy yes the best

SNORT

AGAIN??

Is this the same guy? Who I kept catching on fire?

The way this is worded amuses me

As if he’s intentionally setting fire so he can be rescued by a big strong firefighter

Me thinks the fire IS RIGHT THERE

With the odd lighting mhm

and the sounds of intense crackling

(temporarily appears as he tries to extinguish the fire)

he’Ll be FINNNNEEE

me : (just strolling around) WHAT’S HAPPENING HERE

Bbee : YOU BIG BABY

Rufus : YOU RUST BUCKET

Bbee : G A S P.

Rufus really trying to get himself hated all over

Elly : Don’t mind me lol

Bbee : (unhappy grumbling) (but also happy grumbling cause he’s an evil sim that thrives on this) 😉

Rufus : HAHA CATCH ME KITTY

Bbee : So… I have a theory. Here me out. Has he quite literally lost his marbles and he’s just unaware of everything around him and thinks he’s dreaming

It’d be on brand for this ISBI

LOL WHAT WHY

HE’S ALREADY BUTT NAKED ELLY, WHAT MORE DO YOU WANT TO SEE

Livvielove : (my bff who hears me rant about things) You clearly have no sense for adventure

cLEARly lmao

I had to find these KIDS who never came home

GOTTA PRAISE ERIKA

SHE’S DOING HOMEWORK

While Egbert is reading a romance novel and Esme reading about video game cheats

I relate to both

YOU AND ME BOTH GIRL

But you’re the one who made the wish so we better get it out of the way

Elly: Dad…. dad I’m… a VAMPIRE

Rufus: Oh my god what

Bbee: Lol piece of trash

Rufus: Weren’t you a genie. I FEEL BETRAYED

Elly: I’m both duh

dammnnnnnn

Rufus you really dedicated to ruining everything

Maybe Bbee right

Elly: ANYWAY POINT OF THAT

Elly: Was to transition into me hypnotizing you so we can build our relationship faster

It certainly worked, he’s dazed now but I dunno if that will actually help relationship boosting

Elly: Hopefully I can leech some stardom from you cause for some reason you have 3 stars and I still have just have 1 star

AND I GET POINTS FOR 5 STARS THAT’S RIGHT

Elly: huh and I heard you don’t give a shit about her anymore and you’ve been cheating on her with THE NANNY

could you get anymore cliché though Rufus

Speaking of Diana, she wanders the house trying to better her life

WISH I COULD ACCEPT LOVE

But I can’t control you anymore

LOL ERIKA

Erika: IM BORRREEDD

COME BACK HOME THEN

At least Elly is gaining SOMETHING from this

Skilling charisma lmao

Also I’ve got her belting out jokes since Rufus has the Good Sense of Humour trait

Might get that relationship up faster

ONE KID MADE IT HOME

Esme: And I regret it already

Suck it up buttercup, 3 more days

I HEAR SOME ZAPPING

AND THERE’S EYDA

GETTING ELECTROCUTED???

Esme: get OFFFFF I’m trying to go to beD

She got scared…. by BumbleBee apparently but he’s inside…

There’s so much happening in this screenshot lol

Eyda: fuCKFIDSHOG I,m COMING AFTER U ROBOT

also BYE DIANA HAVE FUN AT WORK

YOU MONEY MAKING MACHINE YOU

Eyda: MOM IS THE BEST

Agreed

Elly: Agreed

Elly: This is taking so long please help

careful what you wish for

is all i got to say

Elly: nice

inTERMISSION

CONGRATULATIONS EMMA

YOU’RE MOVING UP

No lie this is a painful process because the game freezes up every minute or so

its constantly on the verge of being extremely maddening

Lol girl over here somehow getting celebrity stars from SHOWERING

What a smug smile you got

Erika: Just thinking about when I can finally ditch this joint

SO SENT THEM TO PILLOW FIGHT

AND GIRL ELLY WENT IN THE DOOR OF DEATH

I didn’t realize she could do that

I snorted real good

Look at that

how beautiful

the bend of his broken neck

mua

As I was admiring the texture rendering of this animation on her armpit

i realized the clock hath strucketh MIDNIGHT

ITS EYDA’S TURN

BLUE BALLOONS

We managed ONE DAY IN THIS UPDATE LOL

It was a lot of me getting back into the Idanezy routine too

Have this pretty picture of Eyda’s face before we separate lol

Self-wetting: 87 x -5 = -440

Failing school : 9 x -5 = -50

NPC visit: 4 x -5 = -20

Passing Out: 285 x -5 = -1415

Accidental Deaths: 5 x -10 = -5

Social Worker Visit: 1 x -15 = -15

Birth: 10 x +5 = +50

Twin Birth: 5 x +10 = +50

Triplet Birth: 0 x +15 = 0

Quad Birth: 1 x +20 = +20

Fulfilling LTW: 3 x +40 = +120

5-star celebrity: 0 x +5 = 0

Honour roll: 0 x +5 = 0

Randomizing every LTW choice and trait (apart from the obligational insane trait) for a whole generation of children: 4 x +10 = +40

Portrait of the torch holders somewhere in the house: 4 x +5 = +20

Having the Torch Holder reach the top of a career: 1 x +10 = +10

Having a spouse reach the top of their career: 0 x +20 = 0

Every 100,000$: 3 x +20 = +60

TOTAL: –1575

 

Holy shmokes

Aint that a pretty number

Bet I could hit -2000 with the way that’s going

5.4 – Rufus DONE F*cked up

WELCOME BACK GUYS

Last time our two torch holders did an age up! And we were with Elly

And there seems to be a big puddle for no reason

None that I can think of

KNOW WHO ELSE GREW UP?

Emmmaaaa, so it’s time to kick her out D:

Beautiful as usual Esme

Esme: (blows me a kiss)

Which also before she goes I better SAVE her so I can share her with you guys. I got pretty lazy on her outfits. Actually looking at my downloading page I got pretty lazy on putting these babies up. I’LL FIX THIS UP LIVE GUYS WATCH ME GO

THERE YOU GO THE PROOF

YOU DIDN’T NEED

THERE SHE GOES WAVING with 17K

And nobody really cares to wave back

Elly: My god that EMPTY counter I cannot take my eyes off it

Mhm

So tragedy guys lol

I kicked Emma out and then remembered SHE has Ylle, Elly’s dragon

So sent Elly over

Elly: Good lord that’s a comfy cottage

HEY EMMA

Elly: Just gonna control you for a hot second ok sis, cause I need my dragon

God powers its great guys

Elly: Are you ready Ylle, my trusty companion, let us go on an adventure

Look at that she a natural

Diana: my son?

Your SON?

Diana: Well of COURSE I do

THE GAME GAVE ME curious hope

As I’m having Elly befriend Grilled she heart farted mysteriously

But nah it’s just the game nonsensically sending me 13 heart farts at once

Ahmagawd I’m proud

YOU GET IT EMMA

GET THAT LIFE

Well pardon YOU DEER

I was kind of like doing a thing, before you JUMPED UP IN HEREE

Deer: O_O

(months later)

HAS IT REALLY BEEN THAT LONG

Elly: She asks, answering her own question

Since you’re being snarky I’ve decided to switch to UR SISTER EYDA

Excuse me Eyda

What is this

(coughs)

Turns out its just me who was lazy and didn’t do her athletic

(goes to make a joke but is hit by how pretty she is right hi)

Eyda: 😉

Yesanywaylook imadeHerAProper Outfit

Im bored cause Eyda went to sleep

And I’m watching BBee try to befriend Orion

And seeing this sim burnt and running off like lmao

ANOTHER FIRE THEN?

WOW CONGRATS EGBERT U WENT TO PEE ON UR OWN

Imsoproud

Egbert: Godsgodthe condition of this toilet is already BAD ENOUGH I dontneedyour patronizing

Imnot thoimreally proud

Wheeeze

A++ face fyi

Taking a shower now huh

Egbert: ! ohgod why are you following me

IM BORED WITH EYDA SLEEPING

Pardon NEVERMIND

BBEE suddenly got interesting

Athletic by hacky sack though LOL

Orion:  a h h h! I am STARTLED BY A LLAMA

Bbee: I take strong offense to both of you

So I was stalking everyone else right

I spot Rufus talking to Esme

About some guy named HARRY

So naturally I’m like ESME DID YOU GET A BOYFRIEND

B u  t no

Apparently Rufus knows who MISTER CHILD KILLER’s parents are

Rufus: Genie, all knowledge comes with the territory

Esme: My eyes have rolled into my head

That happens to me too when Harry Bunny comes up

L O L

YOU DARN INSULTED BY THAT ESME

Esme: I have PRECIOUS time in a day

Rufus: My children are ungrateful of my limitless knowledge

Where was this limitless knowledge earlier Rufus

EYDA FINALLY

Save your family from my judgements

Elly: TODAY LIFE IS MINE TO CONTROL

Lol have fun I’m with Eyda we got PLANS

Eyda: You’re talking about school right?

Oh SHIRT ITS MONDAY

No(sobs)

Aosijdkla

Sorry had to have a moment of appreciation for how beaut Eyda is AGAIN

Eyda: 😉

DO WELL IN SCHOOL BAI

soooooooooooooEnzo I see you skipping school with Erika

Erika: Oh no, I’m going to school I just have to choke on this first

Elly: <_<

Elly: Nobody better be SKIPPING if I’m going

You’re also super gorg

LOVE UR FACE

Lilipad tell him to go to school

He’s got bad grades

Enzo: NO. I’M A DINOSAUR.

Lilipad:

Sooooo was wondering where the hell Diana was

I FOUND HER

In the middle of nowhere

Diana: I have a purpose for being here

I see

Through the wall heckles huh

Diana: It’s a warning BASTARD IS GOING TO TASTE ME

I have no idea what he did, but I’m here—-WHO IS THAT

DANDRUFF

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAA

HI

Dandruff is actually in a domestic dispute

Diana: And IM TELLING THAT GUY HE’S GOING TO HEAR IT from ME

If only you could autonomy get in that house Diana, I’d pay money for it

IF ONLY SOMEONE HAD THE POWER TO-

-5 (its like someone passed out on the door and it opened FANCY)

Diana: I’m here show me the man

Dandruff: Good to see you too sis

SNORT

The game tried

Diana had me refuse it

Diana came here to throw down with Charles and Dandruff turns around and smooches him.

Puts her in an a weird situation.

Diana: …I’m getting mixed signals here.

Esme: As if you’d take me to France

I feel challenged

Esme: What is with all these opportunities anyway did you leave it ON

Seems I DID and I will continue to cause it amuses me

Diana: They’re leaving to go yeehaw aren’t they

LOL RUDE HOSTS

Diana: I regret coming here now. Where’s Rufus.

Poor Diana

It was too much. I get it.

-5

Meanwhile Rufus apparently managed to royally piss Erika off

Egbert: Skipping class tots WORTH IT

Erika: IM ALMOST A GROWN WOMAN NOW

Rufus: Please don’t make that face it scares me

Egbert: Lolololol

EGBERT

-5

At least you’re pretty

RUFUS LMAO

Erika: IS HE GOSSIPING ABOUT ME

EYDA FINALLY YOU’RE HOMeeeright

Homework

…..So missus

Drops it

And it goes back to her inventory

Ohoh

(uses the get help option to go around it)

Lilipad: (RUNNNNNNNNNNS) IM HERE. IM HERE I WILL HELP

Lilipad: I feel so fulfilled, precious child come, I shall inject you with my knowledge

Eyda: ahhhhhhhhhhhkay sure sounds good

Elly over here SKILLING

I’m such a FAN

I was casually just

Watching Eyda try to BFF Mac when this appeared

L I k e

I’m sorry pardon WHAT

I THINK

LILIPAD

GOT THAT FLIRT IN FOR REAL THIS TIME

OISAJDLSKAJDLKAJDLAK

Trying to be themotherOfTheHouse

Lucky as fuck that Diana is sleeping

Everyone judging the shit out of Rufus cause he accepted it likely

And I wasn’t there, but I’m pretty certain that

Lilipad probably did the flirt

wheezeMyGod

I gave you robots CAPACITY TO LOVE

To be together

And also lmao I would’ve expected BBee with the SINISTER CIRCUITS to be the one causing trouble

Bbee: I didn’t cause it but I’m going to SPREAD IT

Oh

Oh

nowDianaKnows

workMight save Rufus

Diana: RUFUS.

Rufus:ohshit

Erika: Ma about to throw down let’s not look Grilled

Diana: Fine be that way.

Rufus: …>_>

Lilipad: whatHaveIDone

Lilipad U FUCKED UP MY COUPLE

soUm (coughs) D I a n a

Diana: I’m going to work.

hokayTellMe what you want to do later, I got your back

Legit y’all the thing with Dandruff and now Rufus same dayYikes

She’s the empress of evil I’d be scared if I were you Rufus

Erika: MA IM ON YOUR SIDE. TEACH DAD.

Rufus:………..

lolYesTime to pick sides

HEY RUFUS what are you doing with Adye?

N o

Yes you’re a piece of trash put Adye down

Rufus: (pouting at me)

While Rufus digs himself a hole

ENZO is not doing so well still

Again with the same GUY too

Me: (flipping out)

I MISSED IT BUT YOU GUYS

RUFUS STARTED LAUGHING WITH THIS BUBBLE ABOVE HIS HEAD

I was trying to give you excuses Rufus, but your attitude has been despicable. You’re DEAD MEAT. Anything Diana wants is gun happen.

Diana fueling her anger quite nicely

Buckets of flowers apparently SNORT

Hey I’m FOR IT

I’m supporting every step of this thanks

Im discovering SUCH THINGS

Like apparently you can gain charisma from talking to a purple dragon

S o m e h o w

OH TIME

QUICK LETS BE SMART

IMMA SEND YOU TO BED

…

The clock struck 12am and I suddenly heard this intense

VICTORY MUSIC so I look at my notifs right

Wheeze first I see is Diana is really going on the FUCK THIS train

And is heartfarting a nobody

Oh LORD

GUYS

GUYS

ARE YOU LEGIT RIGHT NOW RUFUS

Your ass

Is going to end up CHARCOAL at this rate

Elly lost her servant apparently

LOL THERE WE GO

I GUESS THIS IS

THE VICTORY NOTIF

That was a ride

Alright Elly let’s hope your day isn’t as

Extravagant

EMMA HONEY

IT SMELLS BAD

The twins are sleeping lets go stalk you

Emma: If you screw me over I’ll beat you up, simple as that

Oh she’s got this

ohhiEmma

pretttyyy

pretttyyyEmmmmaaaaa…..?

Oh my god dandruff

Is that you

DANDRUFF

Kay Diana legit just got off work and as you can see she’s angry and I don’t want to miss that

But you look like you’ve got something going on so like

Make it quick

Where the hell are you going dandruff

Still following Dandruff and mid stalk Enzo declaring

He found LOVE

OH SHE’S JUST HEADING HOME APPARENTLY

Cause there’s no ROADS

LOL

Anyway quick lets go see Diana

Diana has equipped

The Nightmare Suit

Everyone Beware

Amestia: Kick his ass out love. IM WITH YOU GREAT GRANDDAUGHTER. He never should’ve done the thing he did, you should like do-

Diana: Yeah kay I don’t know you

Amestia: RUDE, I was just going to give you some POINTERS

Diana: I’m good thanks old ghost crone

About that u know

I wouldn’t mind KNOWING exactly what

Ur going to do to Rufus u know like would not mind knowing

Diana: Don’t worry. It’ll be good. 😉

Gets cliffhangered so I’m taking you guys down with me

Guess we’ll know in a few months

 

Self-wetting: 87 x -5 = -440

Failing school : 9 x -5 = -45

NPC visit: 4 x -5 = -20

Passing Out: 285 x -5 = -1415

Accidental Deaths: 5 x -10 = -5

Social Worker Visit: 1 x -15 = -15

Birth: 10 x +5 = +50

Twin Birth: 5 x +10 = +50

Triplet Birth: 0 x +15 = 0

Quad Birth: 1 x +20 = +20

Fulfilling LTW: 3 x +40 = +120

5-star celebrity: 0 x +5 = 0

Honour roll: 0 x +5 = 0

Randomizing every LTW choice and trait (apart from the obligational insane trait) for a whole generation of children: 4 x +10 = +40

Portrait of the torch holders somewhere in the house: 4 x +5 = +20

Having the Torch Holder reach the top of a career: 1 x +10 = +10

Having a spouse reach the top of their career: 0 x +20 = 0

Every 100,000$: 3 x +20 = +60

TOTAL: –1570

 

5.3 – Cheesy Pets

Bambi says we at EYDA today

WOOT WOOT

Lol all the kids are apparently starving

I am a good parent

HI SO 5 MINUTES OF RESEARCH told me I need to BFF 3 pets before I can adopt a unicorn

So today I shall ADOPT PETS for this

But first

Emma who has her birthday in THREE DAYS BY THE WAY godnoalready

Is being cute

And Erika is

BEAUTIFUL MONKEY ERIKA

LOVVE YOU DON’T CHANGE REALLY

Guys look at my smart ass who couldn’t find the pet adoption option

For a hot second thought the Adoption Service was it

And I clICKED On IT

Likepardonwhat

What

NowaitWAIT

IDONT WANT MORE KIDS

But it’s okay the game doesn’t think I’m good enough for that

Which is really tempting, like I can sense the game is laughing at me YOU CAN’T ADOPT

But if I really wanted to, game…I could. I COULD.

Anyway, this also puts a wrench in my plans as I don’t even have the option to adopt a pet

But it’s okay

For I am GOD.

MUAHAHAHA

I can’t wait to give these all unnecessary intros guys I hope you’re ready

Lord I do enjoy making my game suffer. The Idanezys being horRID might have something to do with me…

FIRST LET’S SAY HI TO

DEATHSCAPE

No I kid, this is the CAT clearly naturally

His name is Mac

For Mac&Cheese get it

Hahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

(coughs)

NEXT UP ORION

And there’s actually a story behind that

Here it is. So I’m writing this serious story legacy did you all know? It’s called Light the way to heaven and right, at some point during my 9th generation I met this horse and fell in love. He showed up once and I used him in my story and I have yet to find a good way to bring him back, but my wife can attest to it, I have a weird obsession with this horse.

Even to the point where I very exclusively find him in another games (or add him in my ISBI FOR THE SAKE OF IT), like in Skyrim. Here picture proof.

Anyway

Next pet

LAST ONE

THE DOG

Nothing special about her

Except her name

Oh

Oh no guys

HoW DO I payTHEBills???

lordWOOPS

HaaaYEAH

TELL HER GRILLED

TELL HER GOOD

How dare she give us bills

Please Emma stop being productive

It pains me more than your unrenderedness

(sobs about having to say goodbye in 3 days)

Were you always this pretty

Emma: Yes

SURE

WHY NOT

I aint doing nothing else than helping Eyda befriend the pets

I love your hairdo Esme

Esme: 😛

No really who is ur hairdresser

Hey looks like CONTRARY to her twin

Esme did NOT get stood up

Things must be getting serious

ADULT SUPERVISION has showed up

The cats in sims are so cute

MY GOD

Checking up on my robots

Bbee’s ALWAYS up to something lmao

Face of a woman who cares for NAUGHT

Bbee: YOUR BIGGEST WEAKNESS IS YOUR OVERLY EXPRESSIVE FACE

Well aint nobody gonna argue with that

Well Mac needs to understand that treat feeding gives relationship points

A picture of Egbert cause he’s GORG but he doesn’t do anything

Except fail at darts

Egbert:Imtryingok

WE REACHED PETTING LEVEL

THIS IS GOING GREAT

I’m not sure if like the one sim that adopts the unicorn needs to be BFFS or if it can be anyone in the household, but I’m just going to have both the girls do it just to be on the safe side

Eyda: Who is the cheesiest cat? YOU’RE THE CHEESIEST CAT

Eyda: Consider yourself lucky, you are now a royal cat

Mac: Acceptable

OH WHATS THIS

DANDRUFF

YOU PROCREATED

Gosh you’re looking good

I heard giving birth was harsh but lord

Hai a waste of your genes

But loooooooooooooool

You know

I’m in a constant state of hearing woohoo sounds in the background

You’d think I’d KNOW who it was at this point

ITS 8PM AND LOOK

WHO HATH COME OUT AGAIN

ITS MOSEY

And it’s EYDA’S TURN

To be a stalker hohoho

You’re probably going to pass out

Like Elly did but

The unicorn is worth it ok

Though like there’s a bug and Eyda can’t seem to watch it…bah too bad GO HOME I’ll get Elly to again next time

Meanwhile Elly

Is

Skilling??

Elly: You act as if we can’t take care of ourselves

You even

FINISHED IT?

Elly: Lord

Look you don’t understand the pain that was the first 4 generations of this ISBI

MIDNIGHT

SWITCHING TO ELLY

And we can sell that painting

The most precious 3$ I’m ever going to get

Elly: Me lord

SNORT

Rufus knows how to amuse himself

I love it keep having fun

Mosey: YOU CAN’T SEE ME

Elly: You’ve got a huge pointer on you, PRETTY VISIBLE

LOL MOSEY

Being annoying

And going to see BBee like its no big deal

Oh man the twins are also growing up in two days!

Guess that’s my goal for this update

THINK WE CAN MANAGE IT FOLKS?

One day so far has taken half the update LOL

HO MY RUFUS TOO

Lol meanwhile Diana’s still got a wayyyss to go

Enzo’s having fun in the wild that is life

EYDA

WHY ARENT YOU IN SCHOOL

Eyda: I have to teach my brother how to go to school. Ditching class is unbecoming of sibling royalty

Egbert: …

Aye aye

GUESS WHAT GUYS

DOGS ARE CUTE TOO

Lol guys you know I think Egbert is the only one who has a positive relationship with Bumblebee

Oh yeah lol your new assistant

HM YOU KNOW

I WAS DOING PRETTY GOOD THIS UDPATE

-5

 

WHAT LOL

HOW DID HE HAVE TIME

He’s always in bed with DIANA

Lord what happened

What DID I MISS?

This game I swear

If something did happen like, clearly no fucks are being given

Well bad word choice

MANY ARE BEING GIVEN JUST (coughsnorts)

Y’all know what I mean

More on Enzo chronicles

SEEMS THINGS ARE LOOKING UP

So I was wondering where Esme was right lol

Guess she found herself an underground PARTY

Hahahaaaaaaaaaaa

Bunkbeds guys amirite

NOT BAD GUYS

Last day!

And we’re with Eyda for it

Orion cares NAUGHT for Bumblebee

And this is the content I’m here for

Hahaaa, if Elly ever manages to adopt Mosey that’s going to be her steed

So ORION is going to be Eyda’s steed

Girl’s already got Orion BOWING to her

Eyda: Can’t believe you’re going to leave soon.  You’re going to be off and having babies in NO time

Emma: My desires for children diminishes as these plasma boxes accumulate

Truth

Hi Orion what the fuck are you doing

Orion: mE? Nothing

Mhmmmm

OK I KNOW

IM CONTROLLING EYDA RIGHT NOW

BUT LISTEN GUYS

Its not my fault I swear

-5

I meaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan

ITS DANDRUFF

WHY NOT

Elly: I TAKE A LOT OF OFFENSE TO THIS. SHE WAS MINE FIRST. Bella im coming after you

Snort

Not gonna lie this worries me

A tiny child cleaning the hooves of a large horse

Reaching petting stage with these animals is such EFFORT GUYS

But so satisfying

Lol I mean, it’s your last chance my guy WHY NOT

HAVE FUN EMMA

Emma: Urg no I was Netflix and chilling

LOOK AT THAT GUYS

HUG STATUS

Eyda is friends with Orion and Mac now

Elly needs to catch up here

HEY DIANA just checking up on you lol

Party seems fun is this Dandruff’s house

My god its quite

Stony

Dandruff: I didn’t invite you

Alright alright imma go see Emma

My god girl that is a soft face

Are you INTO THIS lad

Emma: He’s kinda cute yEA

Hai alright let me make him over for you then

Oh boy

I have

My work cut out for me

Considering what I had to work with this is pretty decent

ALSO YES I SPLASHED SOME PAINT ON HIM

Now to leave these two LOVEBIRDS ALONE

Midnight hath been STRUCK

ELLLLLLLLLLY

WHERE YOU AT

I dislike this picture

Who tried giving Elly a bedtime story

WAS IT YOU EGBERT you look GUILTY

Bbee: That’s just his natural state

Elly: oh buRN

Omg

Dandruff: I’m just being polite to my sister

Diana: snort YOU’RE WELCOME

Wheeze checking up on these two

Look how LOVE STRUCK this boy is

I ship it

ITS TIME GUYS

PULL OUT THE CAKES

I’m so terribly nice I know

Felt like Rufus deserved his own cake into adulthood mhm

Not bad darling

Rufus: 😉

EMMA’S TURN

And plz Egbert

Put on some pants i beg of you

SNORT

COMMITMENT ISSUES

Guys

Guys

shespretty

ALRIGHT THE TWINS NOW

Oh Diva huh elly

DIVA

SHE’S GORGEOUS

 

LOOK AT THIS CUTE ASS PROFILE GUYS

Let’s see if Eyda has the SAME

Ok but y’alls grades were NOT that bad

I did a good job okay

She closed her eyes like a dunce

BUT SHES PRETTY TOO

SAME FACE

LOOK AT THAT PROFILE

Hokay guys

Good update

 

Self-wetting: 87 x -5 = -440

Failing school : 8 x -5 = -40

NPC visit: 4 x -5 = -20

Passing Out: 283 x -5 = -1410

Accidental Deaths: 5 x -10 = -5

Social Worker Visit: 1 x -15 = -15

Birth: 10 x +5 = +50

Twin Birth: 5 x +10 = +50

Triplet Birth: 0 x +15 = 0

Quad Birth: 1 x +20 = +20

Fulfilling LTW: 3 x +40 = +120

5-star celebrity: 0 x +5 = 0

Honour roll: 0 x +5 = 0

Randomizing every LTW choice and trait (apart from the obligational insane trait) for a whole generation of children: 4 x +10 = +40

Portrait of the torch holders somewhere in the house: 4 x +5 = +20

Having the Torch Holder reach the top of a career: 1 x +10 = +10

Having a spouse reach the top of their career: 0 x +20 = 0

Every 100,000$: 3 x +20 = +60

TOTAL: -1560

 

 

5.2 – Egbert the heart farter

(Lol hi guys, it’s SimNano time in boolprop again and I’ve signed up the Idanezys again)

Lol welcome back folks, I indulged in a thing with the boolprop folks and ended up making a literal GRAPH of my points over the generations

Yeah snort, I completely forgot I lost 300 POINTS during a single chapter in generation 3. ANYWAY SEE HOW ITS STABILIZING OUT AT THE END.

Let’s KEEP IT THAT WAY WE GOT THIS

Now where were we…

Balloons are blue so that means I’m controlling EYDA right now

Oh god right EGBERT

MY LOVELY

He does me a SAD with his pretty genes

Eyda was too late putting away the cake

But it made for a surprisingly sweet to look at FAMILY lunch

Emma: Good luck with those points

eRIka

-5

THAT’S YOUR daughter’s bed lord you two

Emma is GORG I love watching her play music

This is absurdly cute

And SO IS THIS

He found the OTHER EGG

BBee: The spaghetti man told me I needed to EAT

I don’t think this really affects the electronics though, so you know I’m actually fine with this

Here have a pic of Rufus flirting with the fridge and Egbert HEART FARTING people all over town as I recount this story

SEE I TOOK A BREAK FROM THIS ISBI, and then I went AND DELETED the town I put them in cause I forgot this was their town. Thought it was some random town I wanted to test out.

Hahahahahsolike it deleted my save but THE GAME HAD A BACKUP

Butlike I still thought for a second that this ISBI had ended, anyway that’s all for dumb behind the scenes snort

Afuhajklsafa

Diana and Rufus legit find every nook and cranny they can squeeze into to have some fun and it makes me gooey to see one of me couples still loving on each other

Egbert: Look AT THIS DOPE JUICE

Erika: THAT’S SO DOPE MAN

Egbert: YOURE SO DOPE

Erika: NAH YOU ARE

Omg what’s this

I’m cruising around while Eyda is in school and I’m catching this kind of stuff lol

With that HORRIBLE relationship sure Rufus, let’s see how well that pans out

BBee: WHAT DO YOU THINK I AM, LILIPAD?

Lilipad: paRDon

BBee: Don’t talk to me again, you and me are thru

Rufus: …aifjoalsfjal DIANA, YOUR ROBOT IS MEAN

Elly: (snorts)

Elly why aren’t u in school

Girl this hurts me COME NOW

Elly: You’re blocking my tv SHOO

Well I mean sure WHY NOT

Let’s meet the townsfolk

Eyda: I can’t reach the bus so…I don’t feel like it anymore

WELL LOL, ok then

Somebody seems uber happy about it

So I’m following her around town right, cause she’s got some permission slips to drop off at town hall, and I’m spotting these TOWNIES

Like Crumpleton is a fancy town alright

And color me DARN CURIOUS of its goings on here snort

I’LL SEE YOU LATER EYDA

So apparently this is casual wear for grocery shopping in this town

Eyda: Why am I here

Youre doing homework shush

Eyda: BUT WHY HERE

Eyda: There’s probably huge drama, like he’s come chasing after this lady

I agree definitely that’s why she hasn’t come out yet

Man: thatsnot-

SHUSH it is

OH LOOK

A really nice looking teen, GRAB HER

Egbert needs a gal

Eyda: Hey, HEY HEY, IM YOUR TO BE QUEEN COME BACK HERE

Well hey that worked

Rina: Hi

Eyda: My entire body is down here

Rina: It’s disrespectful to look royalty in the eyes

Eyda: I like her

Lol so we chatted her up for match making purposes until the gal I was following IRENE came out

Seems the grocery run was to SNEAKILY change outfits

They must not know of her day job

OH THE SECOND ONE

ELLY’S

Ahhh HOW PERF it’s GREEN, great color coding game

Yes, this one is named Ylle, since it’s Elly’s.

SPEAKING OF ELLY

Midnight hath struck BACK TO ELLY

ELLY LETS SEE HOW BAD YOU’RE AT

Elly: I can TAKE CARE of myself thnks

Yes you’re just a bit tired off to bed, you have SCHOOL

They some pretty children though

Look at that sleeping face

Wow Lilipad, what did you do to the local horse population

Lilipad: NO EATING THE GARDEN. BUZZ OFF.

Bbee: Lol buzz off, I’m a bee, I like this comment

Hey what’s that

Bumblebee whats that

In the background the black horse

Omg

Omg

Is that

A unicorn

GUYS IT’S A UNICORN

DANDRUFF NOT NOW

I’M BUSY

Homg homg don’t move let me get Elly

I need a unicorn, I always need a unicorn

Elly: I’ve MADE A DECISION

Elly: AND ANOTHER ONE

Lordlol, I hate the Animal Rescuer one BUT LET’S SEE HOW YOU MANAGE WITH THIS UNICORN. GET OVER HERE.

(game drags me across town for an abduction)

This game is so insulting

IM TRYING TO DO THINGS

Lol Esme

Esme: WHAT DO YOU MEAN LOL ESME

Have funnnnnnnnnn

Lilipad: LE SIGH, time to clean up the yard

Lol start with Bunny, anyway have fun Lilipad

LETS GO ELLY

YOU DON’T NEED SLEEP

I’ve sent Bumblebee in advance to make sure the unicorn stays

Elly: IVE MADE ANOTHER DECISION

Snorrttt

Alright step one WATCH THE UNICORN

Elly: IM WATCHING

Uni: How’s the view?

Elly: Ew shut up

Elly: Omg PROGRESS, get familiar my STEED

Elly: What you doing

 

Elly: stop it

Uni : I’m helping

 

Elly: Now you’re just being mean

Uni: Stop being ungrateful

Uni: Lord you’re in my way

Elly: You put yourself there thanks

Wow what

A pair of teeth you have sir

Uni: Better to eat you with my dear

Elly: Okay I’m tired

Tough luck keep WATCHING him

Oh look lol

Hes got a name

MOSEY

Mosey: ciao folks

NO COME BACK MOSEY

Laterlater we’ll get you

Me: (attempts to speed up)

Emma: (exists)

LORD what a nice set of faces you HAVE THERE

Emma: I’m stretching my face muscles

Lol having fun with Ylle too

SNORT RUFUS

YOU NEED TO STOP

Bbee: He REALLY does, if he’s got complaining to do he can clean the house HIMSELF

Bbee: IM BUSY STOP BOTHERING ME

Rufus: Nuuuuu not the SCAN

Lilipad: Sweet buttercups

Egbert stop heartfarting people

It’s becoming this chapter’s theme

Rufus: Ok I know we have bad relationship but look at Lilipad am I right

Lilipad: ….

Bbee: …

Bbee: Lol right mate, she’s such a metal rod

Lilipad: …

Bbee: HAHA PERSON PERSON PLUS

Lilipad: ……………………….

Lilipad:

Bbee: (winks at me) I’m cool

Sure doll

Ok so I peeked at their traits, and the game bugged out again (SURPRISE) and took all their chips away, so I figured I have the right to this cheat so I manually gave them traits

Just you know random traits

For fun

The ones they had originally and a few extra ones (LOUD COUGH)

And the results are amusing lol, they instantly both ran off to play with things.

Already more than my sims

Lilipad: You’re my first victim

Rufus: TRY AND HIT ME IF YOU CAN

Ok but I wasn’t joking Egbert

I WILL make you the theme of this chapter

Hey Diana watchu doin-

OH lol I see

Diana: hehehehe >:)

SURE LOVE LET’S DO IT

Looking for potential suitors huh

Elly: Something like that

He’s a gorgeous boy mhmmmm

(sadly zooms out)

Lol yes everyone mirror my reactions. But it was WORTH IT FOR THE UNICORN. Or it WILL be

-5

Eyda: le gasp I’m doing better NOT being controlled

Shush

(shrugs) SURE WHY NOT

HAVE FUN ERIKA

Meanwhile

Elly: Hi I have a literal opportunity telling me to talk to you

Isabella: Let’s talk then

Awwhahahaha I’m not surprised

You look good for someone that just got stood up

Erika: Hey it got me outside, now I can play on my phone…outside

Snort

Elly: World domination though NO, that’s not what I’m aiming for, the world is a BIG PLACE YOU KNOW

Isa: Mhm

Elly: I need a second to passout again

snortSURE go ahead

-5

SUCH GRACE

Isa: Yes, her majesty does everything with GRACE

Lol anyways WE MANAGED FRIENDSHIP

Dunno why, I don’t like these opportunities usually but snort she WAS RIGHT THERE SO

Ok Diana, Rufus, y’all need to STOP

YOUR daughter

Is right thERE

MIDNIGHT

EYDA WHERE YOU AT ITS YOUR TURN

Eyda: Bumblebee’s about to give me a bedtime story

Bbee: I do that now

YEAH NO. we don’t do that anymore just go to bed

Ho EGBERT

IS THAT A DOG

I read that you needed to befriend 3 animals before you could adopt a unicorn

And it’s a cute stray dog

EYDA ENOUGH SLEEPING

Eyda: LORD I NEED MY BEAUTY SLEEP

Haaaaaaaaaayes a good sniff

Haaaaaaaaaaaaano where did it go

Goddamn it game

Let the strays stay

They look like absolute monkey zombies

(except Egbert, pretty Egbert)

But I LOVE this picture Xd

Alright Imma cut it here guys SEE YA NEXT UPDATE

 

Self-wetting: 86 x -5 = -435

Failing school : 8 x -5 = -40

NPC visit: 4 x -5 = -20

Passing Out: 282 x -5 = -1405

Accidental Deaths: 5 x -10 = -5

Social Worker Visit: 1 x -15 = -15

Birth: 10 x +5 = +50

Twin Birth: 5 x +10 = +50

Triplet Birth: 0 x +15 = 0

Quad Birth: 1 x +20 = +20

Fulfilling LTW: 3 x +40 = +120

5-star celebrity: 0 x +5 = 0

Honour roll: 0 x +5 = 0

Randomizing every LTW choice and trait (apart from the obligational insane trait) for a whole generation of children: 4 x +10 = +40

Portrait of the torch holders somewhere in the house: 4 x +5 = +20

Having the Torch Holder reach the top of a career: 1 x +10 = +10

Having a spouse reach the top of their career: 0 x +20 = 0

Every 100,000$: 3 x +20 = +60

TOTAL: -1550

 

 

5.1 – Double the fun hohoho

PARDON YOU, you say

As you see the 5.1 as the title of this chapter

Well keep your pants on we’re not there yet, but we’re about to be

HEY DIANA

WANT TO TELL US WHAT HAPPENED, yes no you’re busy being unhappy, I’ve got this

SO LAST TIME WE HAD OURSELVES A GENERATION VOTE YES YES INDEED.

AND ENZO WASN’T THE WINNER

Enzo: Oh geez are you really going to do this

AND NEITHER WAS EMMA

Though she took second place with her like ONE VOTE

It was two sorry

Erika: Oh lord geT IT OVER WITH ALREADY

PATIENCE

Erika didn’t win EITHER

OR HER TWIN ESME

Esme: You’re rubbing on my nerves

Or the only other boy that could’ve broken the matriarchy streak

With his SKIN COLORED EYES?

Anyway moving on to the creep in the background

YES INDEED

IT WAS ELLY AND EYDA

With their skin colored eyes too?? Game gimme a break here

Anyway let me explain some stuff to y’all as I take off all the paintings and get ready for a MOVE

Yes moving, here look at this list of REASONS why we gotta move man

Anyway gotta grab some townies too, like Dandruff.

And Kristine too

I DIDN’T FORGET U ENZO

So YES, I know that usually I wait till I hit YOUNG ADULT before I switch to Torch Holder mode, but it’s going to be DIFFERENT THIS TIME. I mean I’m already doing a DOUBLE HEIRSHIP might as well go ALL OUT

Sooo we’re going to move to a NEW TOWN, this one to be specific.

Taken because like its—I actually have no idea why I chose this one. ITS HUGE.

Like its 2048×2048 what was I suicidal

No like I really chose this, anyway

I also chose a 40×40 lot which isn’t a 60×60 so like WHO KNOWS YOU KNOW maybe im not THAT SUICIDAL

I was really freaked at the idea that I’d lost all the paintings but ITS OKAY

THEY ALL MADE THE MOVE

Including a fish for some reason.

God though folks, building, the worst part aosfjalksfjafa

OKAY I’LL BE RIGHT BACK

Oh actually here JOIN ME.

It took ME 2 HRS to build it, but for some reason I recorded myself and shortened it to 15min, so there if you want a visit of the house you can watch the video.

You can also see all the places I failed lmaooo

Also Bryce Gorman’s statue is supposed to be here

BUT ITS NOT SHOWING UP

Solike I think the ass got lost in the move

Now as I was sayING. DOUBLE heirship folks

That means starting right NOW, both Eyda and Elly are my torch holders.

I love you too HONEY and IMMA MISS YOU

MUA

Eyda her mother’s daughter

BUT YES I WONT be able to control BOTH at once

By which I mean I will alternate everyday between them.

And I will be using THESE balloons to tell whose TURN it is. I’ll change their color at midnight everyday and we’re starting with BLUE which means EYDA

Since that’s her fav color

Honestly so sad that everyone’s thinking about the fountain lol CAUSE ITS NOT FOR SWIMMING

Also everyone is going to stay here till they age up, at which point I’m gonna KICK ‘EM OUT HARSH

Starting with ENZO as its his birthday still lol

And we’re going to make a BIRTHDAY party so we can age up his girl Kristine

Hooolike its almost gonna be worse just controlling CHILDREN TORCH HOLDERS FOLKS

That’s extra DIFFICULTY

Eyda: Yes hi, I’m the new princess, future queen of this town called CRUMPLEBOTTOM. I’d like to order your best party.

Y’all the only ones I’m inviting so y’all

BETTER SHOW UP

Hashitguys Free will started working, and Rufus and Diana wasted no time and already doing a woohoo

Esme&Erika: OHmygod get a room

I’m feeling emotions

BYE DIANA, IT WAS GREAT HAVING YOU PLEASE BE HAPPY AND DON’T STARVE YOURSELF

Eyda: I’m ROYALTY I shouldn’t be doing HOMEWORK

Exactly royalty NEEDS TO DO THEIR STUDIES

Eyda: hurrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrg

(looks up and down)

My god happy Erika didn’t win

HEY DANDRUFF WELCOME

Dandruff: haha I had a husband and a son where ARE THEY

Ah yes well they were ugly, I’m sure you’ll pick BETTER GENES HERE

AND KRISTINE is here TOO wonderFUL

We can get this party STARTED

Lol look at Enzo

He’s super pumped for this

I feel

The slight pang of regret

beAUTIFUL BOY

DON’T LEAVE ME

KRISTINE

Bah fine lol keep ur hair its not so bad

God 30K guys

I feel dat

Im feeling it

Emma: can u make him STOP he gives me HEEBIES

Lol he’s just super pumped to start his life finally

Dandruff: YOU ALL SUCK, THIS TOWN SUCKS

Staph being a crybaby Dandy

Lol Kristine is darn good at multitasking folks

Hahahahaa

These two breaking in every woohoo place in the house and it kills me

Lilipad: (in a HOTTUB)

Eyda: hahaha did u just refuse

Emma: yUP

Eyda: I AM QUEEN IN WAITING. HOW DARE U REFUSE TO PLAY FRISBEE WITH ME

Emma: I have BETTER THINGS TO DO twerp

Lol so she went to ask Bumblebee who very happily said yes at having attention

Hmmmmmmmmmmmm

OK YES

SIGN ME UP

Didn’t I say I wanted a magician heir too in gen like 3?? COOL COOL

(wheeze)lol

Eyda: I had to be prepared in case you said no

(Fun fact my game crashed but she still wished for this again. TWICE again too. DETERMINED SHE IS.)

Oh lol THAT’S WHY bumblebee agreed

BBee: I cant say no to hitting children in the face

UM BUT ELLY NO

Elly: I was distracted BY THE PRETTY THINGS

-5

Lol I see half of this heirship

Has more trouble than the other

Eyda’s got this down though

I’m ONLY accomplishing her wishes but she’s got this healthy dose of playing and establishing connections with the other people in the house

Lol its almost 9pm

And ENZO IS STILL HERE hahaha going through the house and judging the paintings

Enzo: Well you didn’t give me the chance to appreciate it.

Also im going to blatantly ignore the IF with Egbert

Homg SOMEONE found it??

Who who who who??

I put two down, one for each heiress

And this is meant to be Eyda’s

PURPLE hahaha APPROPRIATE

And since no one is here to claim it LET’S TAKE CARE OF THAT EYDA

We gun call this dragon Adye

Omg hiii

I’ve only played with the BLACK DRAGON

Sadddllly we can’t interact with it till Eyda grows up

Well NIGHT EYDA

Its only like

11pm though, I gotta twiddle my thumbs for another hour before I switch to Elly

YAY

SWITCH

Ohlord is that garbage

Oh honey Elly you poor thing

BEDTIME STORIES HUH

Its ok I’ve come to save you but first we’ve gotta clean up the yard

Elly: I hope spoiling my hands was IMPORTANT

Yes um, cleanliness is a princess trait, anyway hop to bed

Oh my god Enzo hahahaha

As long as you don’t DIE here

That’s the only way I could lose points snort

Lol the STRANGE THINGS

IM SEEING WITH

Free will

Bbee: (kisses his forehead) I’ve now adopted you

ENZO

THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS when you stay here too long

YOU LOSE THE GIRL

Like you two literally live together boi

Priorities my folks

But also this day is going to be fast lol cause the twins have school

SPEAKING OF

Off EVERYONE GOES

I’m stuck with these two all day who from the looks of it are still very busy lololol

It makes me goo though

Lilipad still exists true but like

She’s still in the middle of her passionate love affair with the the hot tub

Lilipad: This one gets ME

I mean do you

Rufus: NO. im happily married

(presses x)

Omg woah

What’s happening here

And the girl beside him is dripping wet??? WHAT DID I MISS

And now he has mysteriously disappeared

What is

This town

(kids have trouble going into the school for some weird reason, I force them all in)

(I save)

(10 minutes go by)

Kay but like the IDANEZYS are seriously cursed lmao, this save is only like a day old

Poor Diana is lost without ME lol

Unless she’s bonking her husband she CLEARLY DON’T KNOW

HOW TO TAKE FOR HERSELF

Oh my someone’s looking at potential spouses

Mhm mhm I support this

Lol well she’s getting comfy already

Erika: I bet they were going to tell me to feel at HOME, so might as well start early

Hmmm hopefully he has better genes

Dandruff: BUTT OUT

Some pictures are just SO PRETTY aren’t they?

ALSO tomorrow is EGBERT’S bday and that completely snuck up on me lol

Snorrrrrrrrt

Dandruff: (throws stuff at me)

Elly has some weird wishes

Apparently we absolutely HAD to go the graveyard

I dig the lighting tho, giving her creepy looks

Elly: and they were never seen agaainnn

daYUM

Somebody SLIPPED OUT and had some fun without me knowing

Dandruff: DON’T SAY ANYTHING

(wheezes as I swallow my words)

HAAAAAAA

We got home Just in timE to switch and for me to send Elly to BED

Or else she’d pass out

WOOOOO

This double heir ship thing is keeping me on Me toes

My god yes BRING IN THE DOUGH

I spent a lot of money on this house so we’re back to 150K, and points are at 400K next

AND I NEED POINTS I DO

YUP

FOLKS

YUP

THAT HAPPENED, Erika was OUT TOO LONG AND PASSED OUT tryna make it to her BED

-5

Heh your bday has PERF TIMING boi

I can end this chapter on your teenagehood

Bbee: GO MY  BOY. GROW GROW

(braces)

(sobs)

I didn’t brace enough

WHY ARE YOU CUTE AS SHIT

I have a lot of pain over this

 

 

 

Self-wetting: 86 x -5 = -435

Failing school : 8 x -5 = -40

NPC visit: 4 x -5 = -20

Passing Out: 280 x -5 = -1395

Accidental Deaths: 5 x -10 = -5

Social Worker Visit: 1 x -15 = -15

Birth: 10 x +5 = +50

Twin Birth: 5 x +10 = +50

Triplet Birth: 0 x +15 = 0

Quad Birth: 1 x +20 = +20

Fulfilling LTW: 3 x +40 = +120

5-star celebrity: 0 x +5 = 0

Honour roll: 0 x +5 = 0

Randomizing every LTW choice and trait (apart from the obligational insane trait) for a whole generation of children: 4 x +10 = +40

Portrait of the torch holders somewhere in the house: 4 x +5 = +20

Having the Torch Holder reach the top of a career: 1 x +10 = +10

Having a spouse reach the top of their career: 0 x +20 = 0

Every 100,000$: 3 x +20 = +60

TOTAL: -1540

 

 

Generation 5 heir vote!

Haaa didn’t think i’d ever GET HERE BUT HERE I AM

Here are your choices 😀

Enzo!

He’ll have a pretty simple life if he wins and I’ll grab his Kristine to drag to the new town for him!

Emma!

My god she’s the girl whose skilled the most! And she’d have more points in music if the game hadn’t crashed as many times as it!

Lol she’ll have a very MUSIC ORIENTED LIFE that’s for sure

Esme!

She’s a tough girl from what I’ve seen so far, and she whipped out the celebrity wish on me, so if she wins I’ll be exploiting that to MAXIMUM.

Everyone will know her name heheh

Erika!

Contrary to her twin, Erika has given me nothing to go on lmao, so I’ll probably come up with something was we go along or she throws more wishes at me.

Egbert!

Little FUTURE boy here. If he wins were going to convert to FUTURE TECHNOLOGY and he’s going to be a science oriented boy.

Will mostly likely attempt to max out astronaunt and science career.

Elly & Eyda!

FINALLY, the last pair of twins! I’ve actually got a fancy DOUBLE HEIRSHIP planned for these two. They’d both be in charge and I’d send them off on a ROYALTY themed generation. Where they’d basically tyrannically take over a town lol XD

 

So there are your choices!

I can’t wait to see who winnnns

 

 

4.12 – Last chapter of the generation!

OMG OMG OMG OMG

GUYS

GUYS

I BUILT A NEW PC

And now I have legit graphics and gpu and andandandan

Aoifjsalf Ive tested and died on other saves, the smoothness of it all aoisdjasafa

Could I actually….have a chance at getting into positive points?

GOD LET’S SEE HOW THIS SAVE GOES

Hihihihi

Hi guys don’t mind me, im just relishing in this suddenly NOT laggy save

Emma: HA, hear that MA. I’m going to have the best heirship ever!

HEY no one mENTIONNED HEIRS

(taps mic as I watch everyone watch Diana put away the cake)

Yes hi the game is smooth as a baby’s bottom, y’all can use your free will now

 

I mean you all DESPERATELY NEED it

Emma&Rufus: (follow Diana as she takes care of Eyda)

Me: (cheats on the new baby names cause its been a while)

ENZO

MY GAME IS AMAZING

What are you doing RUINING IT

Enzo: you haven’t given us ANY TIME to get used to it!

-5

Oh myyy people are BEATING Diana to the punch

Punch being babies in need

Diana: And its BOTHERING me, these lazy people getting off their asses all of a sudden

They didn’t all have me controlling them

Diana: Um no

Um no indeed

Esme: HEY MA, JUST DOING A SLEEP. Like a good girl

Diana: Yeah no I don’t think so, get out of my bed

Diana: WHAT IS THIS ROUTING PROBLEM

Esme: WASHIS DIS ROUTHING

Me: (snorting)

Diana: I’ll ground you for your attitude tomorrow I’m too tired right now

Esme: Ok, GRANDPA RHAM I WANT A BEDTIME STORY

RHAM you and your fricking book

And also ESME, nobody else asks for a BEDTIME STORY

Erika: (stuck in the railing) Great game watcher

Aosifjslafa

-5

Oh my god girl can’t even be bothered to SLEEP

It’s a NAP only

TENTATIVE BUT OK LET’S TRY IT

Who knows the game might be nice

Aoifjakljflaf

GURL

Diana: It’s afterbirth hormones!

GURL COME ON

Nope, nope, wish squares are filled

I looked away for 5 seconds but Diana got a THING ON HER MIND LOL

She’s grasping that free will indeed

OK MAKING IT OFFICIAL

This chapter ENDS in 7 days when Enzo grows up!

And that means a HEIR VOTE SO

START LOOKING OUT GUYS

Heheehe this is great guys, FREE WILL AGAIN

Annnnd tomorrow the last set of twins grows up and we’ll officially have all the potential gen 5 heirs read

Lilipad: Those people at your old work don’t KNOW what their missing. But that’s good, we can profit and you can fulfill your true function as my underling.

Rufus: Thanks?

Haaaa I love Emma

Whenever she has a LITTLE BIT of free will she runs straight for the instruments XD

Oh my god bumblebee

Ohmygod

Maybe you could like

Charge yourself in the charging machine

Instead of SYPHONING ENERGY FROM IT

 

Or you could syphon from Erika WHO DIDN’T SLEEP ENOUGH LAST NIGHT

-5

School wiped her out. I get it tho

God guys

The game is going so SMOOTHLY that I actually have EXTRA TIME lol

So we’re getting Diana on painting for future torch holder pics

HOOOO

DANDRUFF

HER BABY

That I had to find out through SP like shame on you

Dandruff: (rolls eyes)

I aged him up in CAS real quick to see lmao and godddddd

Yup that’s your son alright

Dandruff: T_T

OY OY

WHATS GOING ON HERE

Lilipad: ITS NOT MY FAULT

BUMBLEBEE

Stop beating up my cleaning lady

Shes the only one who actually does anything and the bathroom needs WORK

BBee: Heh tis cool I got my fill

Oaifjsaklfjas

IS THAT HOMEWORK

I LOVE YOU

HERE HAVE SOME HEIR POINTS

Emma: 😉

Enzo: Imsleepingzzzzthis isn’t fair

Emma: Who is that

I actually have no idea

This kid just showed up in our house and is having the time of his life

And JUST AS I NOTICE HIM, he hopped on the street and proceeded to DISAPPEAR

HEEE time for Elly and Eyda’s BDAY

Bring them to TODDLERHOOD

And we’re down to 6 DAYS

Starting with ELLY for no specific reason

Hellloooo ELLY

Hoooo Rham’s hair AGAIN, and your mom’s skin and eyes.

Not a combo I had, I accept.

CUUUUUTE

Now THIS IS A BABY

Not like these two monkeys

I CAN SEE INSIDE YOUR NOSTRILS

Yeahhhh dumbos she’s over here lol

As long as Eyda doesn’t have black hair I will consider her a SUCCESS

>_>

You know

I

Im not sure

Afisjafjsalkga

SHE’S SO ABSURDLY

CUTE

IM SORRY WHAT OTHER KIDS

She looks like an Esme clone in coloring but uh

BYE MONKEY CHILD

HI EYDA

Can I just like spam the rest of the chapter with your cute ass face

SO PRECIOUS

Also look at these wonderful SKILLING TODDLERS

Esme: You’re not making it easy to love my little sister

Look its not my fault you’re a monkey

Esme: 😡

Ok but I feel a bit bad, and Diana has a lot of wishes for Esme since they somehow go into relationship red??

So got Diana to help her tutor. SOME MOMMY DAUGHTER TIME

I’m kinda bummed no one got Rufus’ BLUE HAIR BUT

At least you know, comforted knowing all his kids have a chance of giving their kids blue hair

Y’all HAVE TO STOP

NO FIGHTING

IN THIS HOUSEHOLD

Lilipad: I NEVER START THESE

Lol gosh bumblebee using his sinister chip

I’m freaking out over the fact that I have TIME lol to teach the kids to walk

NEVER BEFORE SEEN

Oh my god what are these interactions lmao

Rufus: There’s just…something about its ROUNDNESS no?

Enzo: You’re just trying to find something weird about her cause she keeps stealing the twins

Rufus: no…….

Enzo: SHAME ON YOU for hating her, that robot basically RAISED ME YOU KNOW

Rusu: Yes this is what I have a problem with >_>

Diana: Your dad and brother are standing in my future gravestone spot. They better get off soon

Emma: Oh dumbos

Omg not only was I impressed that Emma found Bryce Gorman’s room that’s never visited

But APPARENTLY someone else had to and dropped a whoopee cushion prank

I FOUND OUR PRANKSTER

Lilipad: it’s important that you know the words to claim me as your true mother

Oaisjlakfjsa

(freaks out over the skill teaching)

–Here’s a secret guys, the game is smooth as hell, but has managed to crash SIX TIMES so far lmao—

OFF TO WORK??

My god you still have that

Its been so LONG

 

Haaaa that feels nice

Lol look at how much they’ve MISSED YOU

So generous gosh

We’re doing a countdown folks YES WE ARE

5 DAYS TO GO

Another BIRTHDAY

EGBERT

Maybe you’ll get more interesting now hohoh

YOUR MOM’S SON THERE’S NO DOUBT

Diana: (whaps me)

Lol he’s a good looking boi

With the added trait hot-headed

THAT SHOULD BE GOOD

He still doesn’t have INSANE tho which puts him in heirship jeopardy.

All it means tho is if he wins I’ll have to work hard to get him a trait as a teen

Boi is actually giving me lots of INTO THE FUTURE vibes

So I got generous and he gets a double future bed lol

I LOVE THIS COMP

I’m over here wondering where everyone is

Well they’re up on lvl2 doing THINGS

Here have a cute boy and a GAL DOING HER HOMEWORK

ERIKA HERE HAVE SOME POINTS

Enzo: Here’s the deal, scare the poop out of my little brother and I’ll let you scare ME for once

Bumblebee: The temptation is there for sure

Egbert: That’s…not fair

The heir wars HAVE BEGUN HAVE THEY

Egbert: When I’m older IM GOING TO BE AN ASTRONAUNT

You’re so CUTE

If you’re heir I’m making you an astronaut I promise

Lol Bbee trying to babysitter bizz

Elly: And I HIGHLY DISLIKE IT

Bbee: I don’t have the nanny trait WHAT DO I DO NOW. (ends up putting the baby back)

These two REALLY get along since free will became a thing

Esme: Only BABIES try and use their mothers for heir points

Emma: 😛

Heheh folks come here, sit beside me

Our boy got invited on a date, LET’S WATCH

Enzo: don’t do a bg check don’t-

I FOUND HER

She’s decently far away from the tree, Calliope’s grand daughter and Calliope was a gen3 spare.

Alright, I give you my support.

Hmm but like

She could use a makeover

Enzo: Could you NOT

THERE WE GO. Continue on 😉

Enzo: …

BOY THINGS WERE GOING WELL

Enzo: oafijsalfkas I’m sorry the insane in me was too strong

Lol things just went downhill from there

WAY TO RUIN YOUR DATE BOI

Holala down to 4 DAYS

Damn Lilipad is sly lol

Was having Diana teach Eyda to walk and SHE SWOOPS IN

AND GRABS THE KID

HA ANOTHER SKILLING CHILD

God I’m still riding the wave guys

Esme: Heir points HELLL YEA

YES BY THE WAY

DANDRUFF

STILL WATCHING YOU

Lol Eyda is ON FIRE

And so is ELLY

God maybe the game won’t tell me I’m a horrible parent now XP

(tears up)

I wasn’t ready for all this free will folks

Also I’ve not ANY OTHER FAILS??

Hoo we’re down to 3 DAYS

And today is the monkey birthdays

Lol goddamn it you two

SAME OUTFIT REALLY

Alright here’s to hope puberty favors you

Starting with ERIKA and her new light sleeper trait

And uh yeahhh that’s some small eyeballs for that face

And Esme with the sailor trait

She’s not FANTASTIC, but she’s better than Erika lol

Haaaa next birthday is the last twins AND Enzo

Birthdays ACTUALLY reunite everyone

And we get some ghost action

HI RHAM

God man for some reason it is impossible to get these two out of the red

They’re CONSTANTLY losing lots of relationship points for no reason

You know Esme, I actually accept

I’ve never FULLY attempted this

Lol so hopefully the next 3 days are just me SPEEDING through

And getting Diana to learn the martial arts skill cause she got an opportunity for it

LOOK AT THAT

2 DAYS TO GO

God it’s so much easier when people aren’t failing every five seconds

Lol tying yourself down so early are you

Dandruff: Can you stop judging me for two seconds here thanks

This is EMMA, her thumbnail just has trouble loading lol

But I’m going to give THIS TO HER, cause she’s legit so far gotten to lvl 6 of GUITAR, all on her own, let alone the OTHER instruments

MY GOD

YOU DESERVE TO HAVE YOUR WISH

(game crashes for the 189401421th time as I try to GET TO THE END OF THIS)

Looking at this thumbnail

Yes my game is borked lmao

God GENERATION 5, we’re MOVING OUT GUYS

Snort everyone also sleeps with Egbert cause he has the best bed hands down

In the whole household

God kay I FORCE SPED up because the game is REALLY borked and wouldn’t stop crashing

After this, no matter WHO wins I’m moving towns

THAT’S RIGHT we’ve gotten to the last day, and Eyda and Elly aged up (you’ll see them next post)

Not going to age up Enzo until the heir vote is over!

 

SEE YA FOR THE VOTING

 

Self-wetting: 85 x -5 = -430

Failing school : 8 x -5 = -40

NPC visit: 4 x -5 = -20

Passing Out: 279 x -5 = -1390

Accidental Deaths: 5 x -10 = -5

Social Worker Visit: 1 x -15 = -15

Birth: 10 x +5 = +50

Twin Birth: 5 x +10 = +50

Triplet Birth: 0 x +15 = 0

Quad Birth: 1 x +20 = +20

Fulfilling LTW: 3 x +40 = +120

5-star celebrity: 0 x +5 = 0

Honour roll: 0 x +5 = 0

Randomizing every LTW choice and trait (apart from the obligational insane trait) for a whole generation of children: 3 x +10 = +30

Portrait of the torch holders somewhere in the house: 4 x +5 = +20

Having the Torch Holder reach the top of a career: 1 x +10 = +10

Having a spouse reach the top of their career: 0 x +20 = 0

Every 100,000$: 3 x +20 = +60

TOTAL: -1540

 

 

4.11 – Rendering is a privilege

RENOVATED Emma’s room to welcome in the twins.

As you can see I decorated it appropriately. The monkey was necessary to know where the twins sleep.

REMINDER

Cause watcher knows I need it

This is ESME

The Monkiest Monkey

This is ERIKA

The prettiest of the monkeys

On a side note WHAT A VIEW FOLKS we rarely get to see the outside in this save

It’s quite decided, next gen gets a smaller lot, and the house is gonna have windows everywhere

And since I’m rather pumped at this point to get to the next gen, I’m going to try and fail to get to the end in this chapter.

Which the generation comes to an end once Enzo here grows up

It’s probably going to be pushed back to the next chap because this save lags but LET’S TRY

ALRIGHT FOLKS LET’S DO THIS

(swallows and presses play)

Esme: That’s one down already

HEY WOAH NOW

Esme: The social worker should be coming over ANY TIME NOW

Hahaha

NO

Woops them wishes are all filled out, can’t fit that new one in

Rufus: SON, is that you?

Enzo: yesss daaddd, unlike you I’m actually using this free will.

Yeah only cause you’re in STARVING mode now

WHAT

EXCUSE ME WHAT

You never told me you were dating EXCUSE ME

Dandruff: Shit you weren’t supposed to see this

WHY AM I NOT IN THE LOOP

SNORT SO YOU ALSO THINK

That Esme is the monkiest monkey

Diana: Do not MISINTERPRET my wishes

Alright so I gotta be honest with y’all. Rufus had some happiness points so I bought some things to help him out. Didn’t think y’all would mind

And well WHILE I was doing this, I checked on Diana…

AND APPARENTLY I GAVE HER A FERTILITY THING

Still only got Egbert, because Egbert probably ate his twin

But im scared for this pregnancy

 

Speaking of Egbert, what an angry little pout

Just like his mama

He’s very cute too

Like his momma

Also his needs are very fulfilled now NO SOCIAL WORKER

Oooh my Erika, using your free will I see. You know I’d never realized how pretty your eyes were.

Enzo: Excuse you

Yeah well excuse you TOO

-5

There comes a point where waiting for your failing sim to render

IS TOO MUCH

-5

I really like the genetic diversity girls, keep IT UP

Emma: I didn’t actually ask for this

Erika: (looking like a ROBOT)

Esme: Okay gals you can head on in the bathroom now. I used it good. (scratches butt and sips plasma juice)

Erika: Yeah well NO THANK YOU now, it’s TOO LATE.

Emma: What am I even doing here right now

Emma’s been in a state of crisis since the twins grew up

Enzo: WATCH ME WATCHER. I will find my bed.

IM WATCHING BOY

Emma: ONLY LOSERS GO TO BED

Erika: You’re going to FAIL like this UH

He passes the sister obstacle BUT STANDS PROUD AND CONTINUES HIS MARCH

He manages to open the door

THE AUDIENCE HOLDS THEIR BREATH

WITH A PROUD SMIRK

HE CUDDLES INTO BED

AND VICTORY IS ATTAINED. WOOOOOOOOOOOO

++++Heir points

Good ride

Much fun

Lol Esme what’s up with that

Esme: I’d be the QUEEN, imagine, being the only genie-vampire hybrid. I’d be WORSHIPPED and UNSTOPPABLE.

Erika: Pardon the ONLY ONE

Yeah what’s with that Egbert is also a hybrid. Lol since I’ve enabled it ALL OF DIANA’S NEW KIDS are hybrids.

Emma: Hello genetic reason for my hair. Can I have a bedtime story, I need to do the sleep for points

Rham: That’s such a good idea! And I happen to have this ghost book which is the only BOOK on this lot

YEAH THAT WAS PURPOSEFUL

Erika: WAIT BUT I TOOK A SHOWER

What does this have to do with you passing out

Erika: Doesn’t it….fix that?

No that’s a bed doll

-5

Emma: You can’t say I didn’t try

Pardon

Emma: I asked my great-grandpa’s ghost for a bedtime story, I TRIED

Well you tried and FAILED

-5

Lilipad: Esme go to bed

Esme: WHAT, but dad gets to stand there for hours and he’s JUST AS TIRED as I am

What is that look, are you sending a look our way SPOILED MONKEY

Esme: I’M JUST A POOR NEGLECTED CHILD. I JUST WANTED TO BE QUEEN OF THE VAMPIRES.

Oi you don’t have the drama queen trait

And you’re a tad young

Go to BED before you cost me points

Esme: (singing) IM A GENIE YOU CAN’T TELL ME WHAT TO DOOOOO

Lilipad: ESME.

Esme: ok ok fine GEEZ

I am Rham right now as I watch Esme get into her BED

THIS IS LOW KEY STRESSFUL

SHE DID IT SHE’S IN BED

I’ll be honest I was staring at my screen expecting her to get back and crumble on the ground, but she didn’t

And I realized that’s cause I didn’t have her selected

No more rendering for you at all RUFUS

You don’t deserve it

-5

Bbee: (scares the shizzazz out of Lilipad)

DID YOU JUST KILL THE ONE ROBOT

TELLING KIDS TO GO TO SLEEP

Lilipad: How about you make yourself useful AND CLEAN UP AROUND HERE

YEAH YOU TELL HIM

OH ERIKA

I DIDN’T NOTICE YOU GOING TO BED ON YOUR OWN

Erika: Yeah I noticed

HURP QUICK

OUTTA BED

LETS GIVE YOU SOME LOVE

(sees Esme up on the bed doing nothing)

(stares)

(stares some more)

Esme: See I AM cute, you lie when you call me a monkey

I don’t know what you’re talking about

Diana: I go to sleep for a few hours and my robots are at each other’s throats?

That might be partly my fault

ALSO HOOO Diana is wearing an outfit that I MADE

Yes well it was a first try, so the front part makes her look fat, but once again it’s a FIRST TRY at a clothing mesh and it looks fine from the side lol

So definitely acceptable maternity wear for this last child

Rufus: I TRIED. I WENT TO WORK.

I know you did, I don’t blame you

My game is just MEAN

Me: Alright I’m going to do a SPEED RUN NOW

Game:

Or we can do a speed run AFTER

This seems entertaining hohoho

My my EVERYONE is trying to get the hell out XD

Diana: hey hot stuff, how was work today

Rufus: OH YOU KNOW….itwas

He got FIRED

Rufus: YEAH SO, I lost my job apparently im a BAD EMPLOYEE who needs them anyway amirite (grumble grumble)

Well you were a paper boy and they do say journalism is a dying career

Diana: (glomps him) Oh baby they don’t deserve you

Rufus: THNKS ;-;

Diana: And you’re so much better at home

Diana: you can be a stay at home dad for this new one on the way here

Rufus: heh I can’t wait to be a dad

What about ur other children

SPEAKING OF

Erika: SIGH

Hello there pretty eyes, what’s up

Erika: HEY

Where’s your siblings

Erika: Lolol I like that you’ve forgotten

OH RIGHT THEY WENT TO SEE PEOPLE

I see I’ve missed nothing here

Enzo: IM THINKING

Yes yes think good imma go see Emma

And you’re just as bad IF NOT WORSE

God I’m gonna lose points for this decision

Lol what now

Enzo: Alright I’m decided on what to do

OH WAIT ITS ANDREW

The distant family member who asked Dandruff out and got shot down hahahah

(SNORT)

Enzo: HEY ANDREW

Andrew: Hey so u finally made it inside-

Enzo: HEARD YOU TRIED INCEST

(nods happily)

Boy you’ve got a really good chance at becoming torch holder with those faces

Could make for the first male torch holder snort

Enzo: COULD YOU MOVE out of my way to your way

Andrew: ….

Lol AW the interaction got CANCELED

We are here today to render SHAME

The punishment is no patience to let Erika render

-5

Like daughter like FATHER

XD

Diana: I can’t believe I have to tell you kids to go to bed at your age

Esme: NOT ME I’M GOING TO BED ON MY OWN

What do you mean unrendered

The monkeys always look like this

Im not done with waiting for shit to render or anything

Lilipad: Only I can love you properly, your parents are too busy PROCREATING. Remember me. (whispers) Your true mother

Egbert: This is a cold embrace but I enjoy it

Lilipad: purrs in robot

That got weird

BOY ARE YOU GOING TO PASS OUT ON ME

Oh oof its just ANGELICA fooooo

Enzo: haaaa yeaaaaa

…

-_-

-5

Always a good notif

A+ NOTIF

Would like notif again

LOL WHAT

Who cared enough

TO TEACH YOU

Egbert: I learned on my own 😀

Oh lol I see, that makes more sense

Is this gonna be a dream baby

Are you birthing right now in your dreams

Diana: Is that you finding yourself FUNNY

Come on PUSH, gurl you should be used to it by now

Hey is it me or have you statistically given birth a lot here

Hey you’ve got a great view of your kids going to school between contractions

(serious nodding)

Diana: (pushes me away)

IT IS A BABY

CONGRATULATIONS

Specifically though lol IT’S A BABY GIRL

And her name is Eyda and she’s a blue-

Uh

I guess

I mean  A GREEN whatever game a GREEN BABY

Yes lol this is EYDA

Eyda is also a hybrid genie-vampire

She’s a PARTY ANIMAL and EXCITABLE

And likes the color Dark Blue

Hoooo fancy

I’ll change the crib colors in a sec

YOU SEE

We have ANOTHER ONE ON THE WAY

Also is that a toddler fail in the bg

-5

And WE HAVE ANOTHER BABY GIRL

This time her name is Elly 😀

I waited too, apparently she’s legitimately a NATURAL skinned baby

She’s a PARTY ANIMAL too with the GENIUS trait

And she likes GREEN (snort)

Hehe and that’s +10 FOR MEH

HELL YEA POSITIVE POINTS WHADDUP

 

UM

HEY

WHO ARE YOU

UM

NO

(panic deletes her and her car)

Bbee: Oh hey where’d the social worker who took our cats go

NAH WHO NOW

Lilipad: IM SO BROKEN OVER THIS LOSS

SHUSH THEY’RE STILL IN THE HOUSE

But not in the portrait panel

Ahhhhhhhhh did I break my game (resets lot)

(SOBS)

THEY’RE GONE

I WAS TOO LATE

This goddamn game

-15

There go the baby points

Well I can be comforted by the fact that the cats were all elders on the VERGE OF ALL dying. So I guess this way they all go together

Also we barely saw them and the only one we remembered really was Angelica (sobs again) I hate losing thinggss

Egbert: Life is so much better without CATS, I have so much free will

SHUT UP

It’s cause I reset the lot

EMMA

-5

WAS I NOT SUFFERING ENOUGH

WHERE ARE YOU

Oh

Oooooh

PIANO PLAYING

God I love it, whenever you get a bout of free will you dive for music

And she even has an audience for it

Enzo: No cats, life am I right

OY

Also did y’all know it’s her birthday tomorrow, we’re finishing this update on her teenagehood

Emma: Esme stop looking at me like that

Esme: You’re not looking you can’t see it

Emma: I CAN FEEL IT. STOP IT.

WONDERFUL

(CLAPS)

YOU GET ALL THE HEIR POINTS

Lol don’t mind me I’m just here to uh

Watch Emma play yeah

Enzo: LAWL

Bbee: DOOBIDYTBOO

Esme: 🙂

Enzo: I cheated, I warned her

Esme: You didn’t scare me but you’re on my blacklist now

Bbee: That’s actually scary

Bbee: I WAS JUST TRYING TO GET A CHEER UP. BECAUSE THE CATS.

Esme: I’m super badass

Erika: I like being rich

Diana: SO WHAT’S UP HERE. Everyone doing HOMEWORK?

Esme: OH SWEET LORD THAT MADE ME JUMP

Erika: (snorkels)

Good free will boy

Enzo: Can’t a man appreciate PAINTINGS IN PEACE

LOOK AT HER GOOOO

LOL

Ah yes ERIKA, one of my MONKEY twins, plays the animation in this game that gives children monkey faces

Oh how life works

BIRTHDAY TIME

Erika: LAWLAWLAW

Omg I thought Rufus was bad enough laughing at birthdays

The twins really have inherited from their father

IM QUITE PUMPED FOR THIS BIRTHDAY

Emma is a PRETTY FACE

I CAN’T WAIT TO SEE

(jumps around giddily)

Erika: This is great and all Emma but it’s been like 3 hrs. We’re kinda done.

Diana: I birthed faster than this

Erika: annnnd mom left

Bbee: This party sucks TRASH

Emma: I’m not growing up till I feel MORE LOVE FROM THIS FAMILY

Erika: GOD I NEED TO PEE

Emma: I’d bet you’d lose heir points for tthhaattt

Erika: will YOU JUST HAVE YOUR GROWTH SPURT

Emma: Ah shit I’m stuck in mid-air because of Blams’ laggy ass game

Erika: A new statue, I like it

DIANA WHAT ARE YOU FEEDING THESE KIDS

AINT NO MEAT ON THEM BONES

Emma: (gains dislike children trait) That means I hate you Erika. You’ve directly influenced my life.

Erika: I wouldn’t want to be liked by such bad fashion sense anyways

THERE SHE IS

She’s quite quite pretty indeeedd

Also I slapped a shirt on her that I MADE. I know another mesh, and this one I’m actually decently proud of unlike Diana’s preggo dress.

WELL THAT’S A WRAP FOLKS

With 10 days to go for Enzo’s bday lol

 

 

Self-wetting: 84 x -5 = -425

Failing school : 8 x -5 = -40

NPC visit: 4 x -5 = -20

Passing Out: 277 x -5 = -1380

Accidental Deaths: 5 x -10 = -5

Social Worker Visit: 1 x -15 = -15

Birth: 10 x +5 = +50

Twin Birth: 5 x +10 = +50

Triplet Birth: 0 x +15 = 0

Quad Birth: 1 x +20 = +20

Fulfilling LTW: 3 x +40 = +120

5-star celebrity: 0 x +5 = 0

Honour roll: 0 x +5 = 0

Randomizing every LTW choice and trait (apart from the obligational insane trait) for a whole generation of children: 3 x +10 = +30

Portrait of the torch holders somewhere in the house: 4 x +5 = +20

Having the Torch Holder reach the top of a career: 1 x +10 = +10

Having a spouse reach the top of their career: 0 x +20 = 0

Every 100,000$: 3 x +20 = +60

TOTAL: -1525

 

 

4.10 – Emma is a neglected troll

Diana: What is…life

While Diana hits post birthing depression here

Imma go set up

A baby crib

Ha there we go! I didn’t have to do nothing cause there’s always three cribs here snort

Also though, what’s the point of cribs if they sleep on the floor

HUH ESME TELL ME

You’ve been alive AWHILE NOW, I think you should be old enough to climb in that crib of yours.

-5

Angelica: Maybe out there, there’s an AU where I’m still young and spry…

I dunno you look pretty SPRY to me

PARDON ME WHAT NOW

I can’t believe I had to learn from the TOWN GOSSIP

Nobody talks to me in this house anymore

-5

Really lmao, is THAT how this chapter is going to go

People shouting at me from the streets that y’all have passed out??

GUESS WHAT

They’RE LIARS

Mhahahahahhaah, Enzo is a good boy. Good boy Enzo, here have some torch points.

(distant thump) NO WHOEVER THAT IS DON’T DO IT

Ohhhh sweet

Sweet

Emma.

-5

So like is this a genie thing? The bars like that? If so COOL

I’ve never had a GENIE baby and both twins have genie genes hohoho

HAHAHA

Come now

Is this a teen who looks like he can take care of 4 kids by himself?

I THINK NOT

Omg GAME

What is going ON

Are you okay, let me check your temperature…

Me: GOSh I’m so proud of Rufus sleeping in his own bed-

This is a PROBLEM

Lilipad: Is Erika crying?

Enzo: GOD Erika, let it REST

Not like it’s ESME whose causing all the TROUBLE

Esme: NOBODY LOVES ME

DIANA COME BACK FROM WORK

Free will could you like work

At least a little bit

Emma: I think it’s working JUST fine

EMMA ARE YOU HOGGING IT

Emma: LOL

WHY ARE YOU LAUGHING this is SERIOUS BUSINESS

Emma: The timing is kind of wonderful

OI he’s a MINOR layoff

All the single ladies in town with the same bland haircut suddenly got hormonal

Next generation we’re locking the kids in the basement. They won’t wake NO ONE UP THERE.

LET’S START OUR

BREATHING EXERCISES (sharply inhales)

-5

AFTER EVERYTHING I’VE DONE FOR YOU GAME

How dare you do this to me

-5

Diana: Daughter you know I love you right, I even rolled a wish to talk to you.

Emma: Excuse me who are you

Diana: (renders)

Diana: IM UR MOTHER

Emma: MA IM SORRY I WAS JOKING, GO BACK TO BEFORE

Diana: HEY EGBERT, stressed out mommy’s here to feed you, love you and change you because NO ONE IN THIS HOUSE CAN DO ANYTHING

God do I feel you

I have Diana’s face on as I see Erika dead

On the floor

-5

toddler fails really hurt

Goddamnit EMMA

YOU’RE LOVED

NOW GO TO BED

-5

Diana: You need to delete my wish for a baby girl right now

I wish I could, but we have witnesses.

Lol BUMBLEBEE

You somehow got MORE useless XD

EXCUSE YOU WHAT

EMMA IS A RELATIVELY HAPPY CHILD

Lol I love how Bumblebee and Lilipad are her children

LOOK HERE MONKEY

My TORCH HOLDER needs her SLEEP

Diana: Okay but stop calling my children monkeys RIGHT NOW

This piece of art here is the representation of teenagehood. Falling asleep in your own pee. (nods poetically)

-5

-5

Sooooo I think we’re in the clear lol? No social worker ever showed up.

They probably got GLITCHED in this town really XP

(also Emma is terribly cute in this picture)

CUTE

CUUUUUTE

Ack but like no I want Enzo or Egbert to be torch holder. ENOUGH LADIES

But she’s so cuuuute

 

And SHE’S actually in her BED

Enzo: I just need to stand still another 5 SECONDS, give me another 5!

Enzo: Golly gosh he beat me to it

What are we DOING HERE folks, we’ve barely gotten through a sim day my god

-5

Bbee: Im gonna scare his ass AND HE WON’T SEE IT COMING

Yeah he probably won’t

Bbee: I’m such a sly boy

Enzo: I’m being so productive…in standing…in this one spot

Bbee: SPARKLY SPRINKLERS

Enzo: I AM EXPERIENCING A JUMP

Enzo: Now back to my super productive activity….STANDING.

Bbee: So…that was really disappointing.

We have here Esme being a MONKEY, yeah I said MONKEY

And Enzo just failing at life.

-5

Good documentary folks

Meanwhile Dandruff rubs her freedom in my face. First notif I get and its not about BABY MAKING.

Dandruff: I’m finally LIVING

Hahahaaaaa oops one friendly chat isn’t enough?

Lol what do you mean we need to keep social upkeep of children

THERE SEEMS TO BE A GENERAL CONSENSUS.

Let’s throw Esme in the hottub.

Erika: You’re mean and I’m ERIKA

Lol WOOPS

Diana: If a stranger comes to you and tells you to come with them because you’re being neglected you say NO okay

Emma: Yes ma

Diana: Good girl

Enzo: whAT happened? I missed something didn’t I? SHUCKs, I was too invested in standing still.

Just leave boi

Just for your sake and MINE

Enzo: Alright

SWEET MERCY BOY YOU DID IT

Okay okay FINE what’s up Lucifer

Lucifer: It’s only my BIRTHDAY THANK YOU VERY MUCH

Lucifer: Lol we still have humans here?

Rufus: Hooo BIRTHDAY, I can go pee afteerrr

Angelica: My child is growing up. IM SO OLD.

I don’t think anyone really talks to each other in this family

I MEAN HERE’S A PIC GUYS BUT WE ALL KNOW

That there’s barely a difference snort

Diana: You’re not a monkey, mommy loves you okay, LOOK HOW CUTE SHE IS

Ok she’s a LITTLE cute in this shot.

Welllll then you know we FINALLY have a good window here. Nobody’s on the verge of DYING only ALMOST dying! We should get to BABY MAKING come onnn

Diana: (audible groaning)

Come on now it means getting frisky with Rufus

Diana: (less grumbling)

WAY to make yourself ATTRACTIVE RUFUS

-5

ALRIGHT GUYS LEGIT

I tried to avoid it as much as I could but the lag is REALLY painful, so I’m resetting the town ITS TOO MUCH

We’re still resetting up in here folks and BUMBLEBEE is trying to fuck things up

Bbee: I REFUSE TO BE TOUCHED by another electronic

WELCOME BACK FOLKS

Everyone’s in the green because THATS WHAT RESETS DO RIGHT

RIGHT

Lemme have this

Diana&Rufus: (loud smoochy sounds)

Enzo: oh GOD why did I come in

Emma: HEHEHHEE IM NEVER COMING IN

My god Angelica LOOK

Angelica: LEAVE ME ALONE

Diana: Hop on in whenever you want lovely 😉

Rufus: I’m doing my BEST BABE

God yeah the reset did not fix the lagging

I don’t want to move SAVES AGAIN THOUGH

(whines)

MY GOD RUFUS

You’re making her change SEATS, that’s why it’s taken so long??

Oops when did this happen

Wasn’t he just borned like YESTERDAY

AHEM

Lol have a picture spam cause I actually like these two in general THEY’RE CUTE

I HEARD A LULLABY

GOOD

GOOD

Now no more extra wishes after this one Diana, Enzo only has 14 days left to adulthood. Which means 14 days left before its time to VOTE.

Hehhe it’s birthday time folks!

I’m actually rather excited to see Egbert’s coloring because I just remembered how all the kids have Diana’s hair.

Except Emma who STILL hasn’t come in yet

Emma: I like the outside. The outside doesn’t neglect me.

OH COME ON

Oh my god Rufus why do you need to laugh at EVERY SINGLE BIRTHDAY

LOOK LOOK A RARE MOMENT OF FATHERHOOD

I HAVE TO DOCUMENT IT

Do I get points for this?

No?

Ok

Ha ha haaaaa WHY

Rufus has nice BLUE locks why isn’t anyone inheriting THIS

On other news look at EGBERT

He’s a punk little boy I like him, I didn’t think I would, but I DO

HOW CUTE IS HE THOUGH

Lol MORE subtle signs that Dandruff is doing fucking GREAT

He’s a replica of his momma that’s why he’s so DARN CUTE

I wonder, will he grow up to clip into beds like his momma does too?

Diana: Don’t go putting that on me. It’s your computer’s fault for not being able to handle us

Yeah, you know it’s kind of horrid that my STORY SAVE which is HUGE and FULL of CC and LONGER RUNNING lags less then this one.

I heard Dandruff has nothing better to do with her life, you should go check THeRE game

Excuse you she’s very happily married to RUFUS thank you

But no thank you

Also she just went to vomit in the toilet for an UNKNOWN reason but I totally missed it

Azazel: Also you missed me growing up

yeAH but I needed to look up your name like

the only pet names I remember is Angelica’s cause she’s the only white cat.

Rufus found his way to the BED

Aoisflakfja how CUTE

I ship it

Yeah so WHAT if they’re already mARRIED

Diablo: Was I supposed to pick up the phone and call my daughter IM A CAT

Well I dunno sir, clearly the game says you have the ability

Bbee: Why are there cakes here. And why can’t I eat them

Its for the TWINS, the chapter ends with their bdays

Bbee: Ok but why cant I EAT THEM

Because im letting Diana sleeepp

Lol isn’t this the guy who asked you out Diana

NO GRAND LOSS THERE

Angelica: Hey there how’s IT GOING, are you doing good? Good, I’m just a tad hungry meself

Ooooh you’re VOMITING. WHATEVER FOR I WONDER.

Diana: urgggg I hate u both so much

Alright OFF THE KIDS GO TO SCHOOL

And well just waiting on you Diana now

Whose stuck experiencing pregnancy all over again

(tap, tap, tap)

Alright lol so I got tired of waiting

LET’S GET TO BIRTHDAYS

With Esme da monkey first

And Diana can’t correct me cause she too busy glitching

I mean

Ehhhhhhhh lol

I still see the monkey nope nope

She grew up with HOT HEADED

Oh that should be good

Oh we don’t even get a tummy rub do we

Diana: This isn’t a MOMENTUOUS OCCAISION

This is going to be the most neglected of all CHILDREN won’t it

ERIKA’S TURN

What a monkey

Diana: I can STILL HEAR YOU

With the INNAPRORIATE trait, how APPROPRIATE

See what I did there

Lololol

THERE WE GO WITH A DERP FOLKS

Lol ‘nough with this update

NEXT TIME hopefully the LAST BABY and I need to expand Emma’s room cause she’s going to get permanent viissittoorrrsss

Emma: Oh fuck

 

Self-wetting: 84 x -5 = -425

Failing school : 7 x -5 = -35

NPC visit: 4 x -5 = -20

Passing Out: 269 x -5 = -1340

Accidental Deaths: 5 x -10 = -5

Social Worker Visit: 0 x -15 = 0

Birth: 10 x +5 = +50

Twin Birth: 4 x +10 = +40

Triplet Birth: 0 x +15 = 0

Quad Birth: 1 x +20 = +20

Fulfilling LTW: 3 x +40 = +120

5-star celebrity: 0 x +5 = 0

Honour roll: 0 x +5 = 0

Randomizing every LTW choice and trait (apart from the obligational insane trait) for a whole generation of children: 3 x +10 = +30

Portrait of the torch holders somewhere in the house: 4 x +5 = +20

Having the Torch Holder reach the top of a career: 1 x +10 = +10

Having a spouse reach the top of their career: 0 x +20 = 0

Every 100,000$: 3 x +20 = +60

TOTAL: -1475

I’ve decided to view these in a positive light. I bet you NO ONE has points this low mhm, I’m setting RECORDS HERE

 

 

4.9 – Bumblebee finally gets a win

HI DIANA

IT’S BEEN A LONG TIME

I FORGOT EVERYTHING

So how about uh you fill me in. All I remember is Angelica being freaky as fuck.

Oh well that’s nice.

Wait YOU’RE PREGNANT?

Diana: *mumbles something insulting*

Ah yeessss, I remember you had a monkey face Erika.

It seems times haven’t changed.

Ok no joking aside-

Nope still no difference.

Erika: SAFETY is an illusion

Esme was the prettiest of the twins.

Still monkey-faced.

YES THIS IS WHY DIANA IS PREGNANT.

Diana: Finally you’re back with the program.

It takes me a while you know, when months are spent in between updates. BUT THIS TIME. I HAVE GOTTEN MYSELF A COMPUTER UPGRADE.

*crinkets chirp*

Well to see if this upgrade actually makes a difference or not. With the sims game, it probably won’t because it’s coded to be fucked – or NO WAIT, sometimes the game actually agrees with me. It’s this SPECIFIC SAVE that is coded to be fucked.

ALSO

I got eye mods for the cats. Look at those eyeballs.

Hello yes, Emma, explain to me why Enzo is at school and not you.

Emma: Because it was my BIRTHDAY today

…oh right right, I ASK PATIENCE THANKS

RUN EMMA RUN, SAVE MY POINTS

Also Diana pick your monkey off the floor.

Diana: Don’t insult my children.

Rufus: ITS OKAY ESME BABY I GOT U

Lilipad: oiwqfjlkgjalsav

Yeah Lilipad is malfunctioning OFF TO RECHARGE YOU GO

Rufus: Ah fatherhood

Esme: Only eyes for meh daddy

The monkey twins creep me out

Like at this point I prefer Dandruff because she doesn’t cry in her dirty diaper

Dandruff: ERK stop trying to give me compliments it makes me sick.

Who at this point doesn’t know how to use a door to come INSIDE

Dandruff: That’s a little better

Rufus: I like this computer upgrade of yours. Gives me enough free will to be the daddy I always knew I could be.

And I forgot how pretty your eyes are

ENZO WELCOME BACK HOME

Enzo: Shhhh don’t make too much noise you’ll alert HER.

Who?

Enzo: HEEEEERRRRR

HER: chillldd, where did you go?

WOAH THERE

EMMA

EMMA

Emma: LISTEN WELL MY AUDIENCE

Lucifer: This should be interesting

Angelica: I didn’t have time to be young, why did I grow so old

I’m so ecstatic I forgot I had the Children Can mod

AND SHE HAS THE VIRTUOSO TRAIT SO

Emma: *plays sad dramatic music as Enzo dies*

Lucifer: I knew this would be worth it

-5

So that forced me to look at my points again. I’ve forgotten how I even gain points.

No Enzo, you’re supposed to yell at the toddler for waking you up.

Enzo: but it’s a toddler

LEMME TELL YOU ABOUT THE SHITS sims give about toddlers

Enzo: OK BUT WHAT IF IT BITES

Erika: hurrdduuuurrr

That does make sense

OH LOL LOL LOL

What is this now

Someone wants to take Dandruff out well then Mr.Andrew imma say yes

Bumblebee: Ok Dandy whatever, I’ve come to threaten to blackmail you for fun – what r u doing

Dandruff: Sorry pee spot I have a date

Bumblebee: NO BUT I HAVE AN INTERACTION IN QUEUE. HOW DARE YOU.

Oh shit Diana I was doing something what are you doing

Diana: This is me hating on you

Do you feel neglected? It’s only cause I know you have it in for me.

Jeez woman this is taking forever, I have places to BE.

Like right here.

Who dis boy.

Dis Andrew has ODDLY GREEN SKIN.

OH yas that’s why. Somebody is an Idanezy.

Dandruff: At this point EVERYONE is.

To prove to you that this is incest I pulled up the family tree. SEE I FOUND HIM. Calliope’s grandson, also lmao Mortimer’s son?? Who was ironically a potential spouse for Diana. So there ya go Dandruff he’s like your cousin. Sort of.

Andrew: BURRRRRPPPPP

Dandruff: Wow

Andrew: whew sorry about that OH HERE COMES ANOTHER ONE BURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRP

Dandruff: I’m very unattracted

Dandruff: So yeah you know before we take this palpitating relationship any further I have a son

Andrew: A what

Dandruff: And also a wife who would beat you up. A heads up.

It’s okay my boy at this point

Just leave

Andrew: SO I THOUGHT ABOUT IT FOR FIVE SECONDS AND I’M WILLING TO SEE THIS THROUGH

Dandruff: why am I included in this heartfart

SO I see nothing has changed here

Diana: Your computer upgrade isn’t worth shit

WHY DO YOU INSULT ME SO

And did I just hear a monkey sound

Erika: Wasn’t meh 😉

I SWEAR GUYS I DID

Lilipad: I find your behavior towards my daughters inacceptable

Enzo why are you not sleeping

Enzo: but the cat has been meowing ALL NIGHT

Azazel: I take pride in my work

Bumblebee: I FOUND YOU FINALLY

Enzo: oh crap

Azazel: I also stink. A lot.

Enzo: *uses passing out to cancel BBee’s action*

Bumblebee: DARN HONEY TRAP I SWEAR. PEOPLE GETTING OUT OF INTERACTIONS IS MAKING ME LONELY.

-5

Bumblebee: SEE IM NOT KIDDING. WHY CAN’T THEY LET ME BE AN ASSHOLE. A LEAST FOR A MOMENT.

OH LALA

WHAT

AN

OUTFIT

Diana: You’re not even worthy of a response

You beautiful thing you, Enzo and you are the only worthy children.

Emma: Please I’M trying to do something here.

Bumblebee: MY—DA—Y—–IS NOT —–GOING WELL

This is mildly amusing

As long as this ends with you going to bed

I’m okay with it.

Enzo: PLEASE I DON’T WANT TO PASS OUT AGAIN

Have pity on my Enzo monkey

Diana: Alright fine, I’ll tune you up, but know that the game canceled this interaction three times so you better appreciate this.

I don’t know what my game has against sim-robot interactions

Bumblebee: EXCUSE ME? I am not some BIMBO you can just TUNE UP to bribe my friendship. My friendship requires that I TROLL you first and that requirement hasn’t been met so NO, I refuse this TUNE UP

Lilipad: (somewhere takes offense as she takes care of the children)

Diana: Well I got no qualms over this. And my unborn baby is saying I should annihilate you where you stand.

Bumblebee: I don’t think that’s your foetus talking

Diana: Well that’s true I am the Empress of Evil.

Brittney: …

Bumblebee: > 😦  WHAT NEVER SEEN A SMOKING ROBOT BEFORE? I swear everybody judges me around here

Brittney: Modern furniture sur is talkative

Enzo: Hi Bumble, did you know it was my birthday today? Hope you got me present

Bumblebee: …

Bumbleebee: Oh no that means it’s my last chance to successfully troll him! Oh I’ll come up with a present alright, yes indeed……hehehe

You know I don’t see that happening since you’re stuck in a never ending malfunctioning glitch and you REFUSE to accept help.

EMMA

Emma: What!? Go see the toilet and RECONSIDER your reaction

…

Okay agreed

-5

Lilipad: Dear you see over there? That’s pre-birthday jitters right there

More like BAD FREE WILL

-5

OK QUICK BIRTHDAY BEFORE THE KIDS GO TO SCHOOL

Oh hay Catarina, here to see your grandchild’s birthday?

Bumblebee: YOU’RE A HORRIBLE BIRTHDAY PLANNER. I didn’t get to plan ANYTHING.

Plus like half the family isn’t here but time went way faster than I expected and I wanted to give this boy a day off

Enzo: Aw thanks

Lilipad: NO I’M MISSING THE PARTY

Rufus: Lol I don’t know where I’m going anymore

Enzo: nobody told me growing up KILLED YOUR BLADDER

-5

Emma: Somebody take a pic quick! This is a face he’ll want to remember

Right right let me get a close up

THERE WE GO

BEAUTIFUL

Enzo: I hate you two

What a supportive family

Rufus still booing his children

I might tear up

Not like the MONKEYS could even bother to show up

God

I can’t even LOOK at them

Emma please, you need to calm down on the PARTYING it’s hazardous to your health…and my points.

-5

Enzo: WHAT

Aw babe lmao I’m sorry

You KNOW I can’t resist guys

These pictures are gold

And I think Enzo does noodle best so far

Shiiit guys you should see this, this boy is gorgeous!

Wait I can just share a picture…

THERE HE IS

Look at this Lilac boy

You’re giving me Desmond vibes

You know your uncle whom I adore?

Except you’re a slob and now unflirty

Look at this hunk. Got his dad’s body sliders.

His traits do him no good, but he might just be able to make it on LOOKS alone 😉

Diana: How can I feed this child when it’s in the way!??

I—uh, well I mean it’s your LOGIC

You know I can’t differentiate between the twins on my own yet. Doesn’t help that I don’t play this save for months on end.

But I remember saying Esme was the most tolerable of the two.

Still looks like a monkey to me.

Birthday boy strikes!

And fails so miserably he clips through the floor

-5

Maybe I should’ve sent you to school afterall

EMMA not you tooo

Rufus:  (wailing outside) I GOT DEMOTED

Well serves you right for not using your free will like a non conventional sim!

You seem to be having fun

How is our mother to be?

Diana: She’s having fun

I figured as much

Hoo lala! Guys! Guys!

DANDRUFF is about to move OUT

I think her age got reset for some reason! Cause she’s down to one day HOOYEAH FINALLY

Dandruff: God calm down will you, I already have a bad enough headache as it is

A few real life weeks later…

(opens my game)

Oh but WHAT IS THIS

A lonely GLITCH

Not to worry she’s a toad

And about to hit the road

Pretty SURE free will doesn’t work

In this save anymore

-5

If I can’t see him it doesn’t count right? RIGHT?

-5

At least he TRIES you know

More than I can say about MOST

Giving me the need to FAST FORWARD HERE FOLKS

Look at dat chin though

-5

OH OH LOOK AT THAT

Maybe Free Will just needed some WARMING UP

Yes let’s amp that HOPE meter up a bit

OH MY WHAT’S GOING ON HERE

Bumblebee: AHHAHAHAHA TAKE THAT FINALLY YOUR BLUE ASS IS DOWN

Enzo: SCREW THIS I HATE BEING A TEEN

Enzo: NOW GET OUT I NEED TO PEE

Bumblebee: You mean cry over your defeat

Enzo: OUT

Bumblebee: I love winning

Dandruff: GOD I HATE NOISE. AND THIS HOUSE. AND MY LACK OF RENDER

It’s okay doll I got you

WITH A GET OUT OF MY HOUSE CAKE

Dandruff: We literally just hit the midnight mark

COME NOW

If you cause a fire I will fuck you up I swear

Dandruff: WOULDN’T THAT be something

EMMA WHY ARE YOU SCREWING with this happy moment

-5

Perfect ur ugly, you got the hate outdoors trait, out YOU GO

Dandruff: Oh NO YOU DON’T. You owe me a decent makeover

*grumbles but opens CAS anyways*

Isn’t she JUST GORGEOUS

Dandruff: OI

SO there you go!

Dandruff cleaned up her act and went in town to give me a GOOD GENETIC pool

Dandruff: haha you wish, I’m going to go out there and LIVE

You’re pretty, leave before I change my mind

Dandruff: As if that would change ANYTHING about this really

DON’T TEMPT ME

I could have you stay in the torture shed

You’d pay in SCREAMS OF ANGUISH

Bumblebee: I’m going to miss the only other passive aggressive person in this house

OOF this hurts

40K

Out the window

But hey satisfaction of checking that KICK OUT box

Heeeeeyyy DIANA

Isn’t this like your purple haired

Older sister

Diana: HahhAHAHAHAHAHAA

Dandruff pulled out some MYSTERY super powers and teleported here

SO I think

This is where she lives now

I aint gonna wait around to see if she renders

Rufus: HAHAHA son did you get beat up by the robot again

Enzo: ZZZZZZZONE TIME ZZZZZZZZ

-5

Diana: IM REAL TIRED OF PREGNANT. ALL I DO IS SLEEP.

I feel you hon

Diana: THIS IS MY LAST BABY

Yes I agree lol

GOOD DANDRUFF

Get the romance on

Man you monkeys are boring

Good pic

Ok bye

DID YOU GIVE BIRTH ALREADY

Diana: (gives me the stink eye)

Sorry can’t see it amongst all this unrenderedness

While I wait for a baby birth to end this chapter

Let me just

HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHA

EW

Sweet lady ITS ONLY BEEN a few hours

But hey if you’re going to start baby making now that’s cool

Can’t wait for your fiancé to get a face

Goddamn lady you’ve been pregnant for MONTHS

Diana: Don’t PROJECT your absence from this save on me

Ouch

Lol she just wanted baby money from old dannybrow here

Sorry hon he’s BROKE

Oh hey what’s this

Diana: ME SCREAMING WASN’T ENOUGH?

Diana: WHERE’S RUFUS

Uhhhhhhhhhhhh

Off to get himself

A quickie cleanse?

Diana: aoigjalkgalkhaga

Angelica: heyyyyyyyyy im cute right

Nice butthole

Lol uh

Emma?

Emma: no

Alright you know what if school is where it’s at

You stay there

WHAT SHALL THE BABY BE

FIND OUT

NEXT TIME

HAHAHA

Im kidding

I aint gonna cliffhanger this *snort*

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

He’s

The first Normal skinned but

SHIT

He isn’t

The last child

Diana: Excuse me

So guys this is EGBERT

He’s easily impressed and a light sleeper, and his fav color is white

Diana: WHAT DO YOU MEAN ISN’T THE LAST

Im sorry but like both you AND rufus have that wish for a baby girl and I need to MAKE THAT A REALITY. It’s in the rules

Diana: Shit

I feel you

Also I think Egbert is a vampire????

But he must be glitched cause it AINT showing up

WELL HERE GOES PEEPS

Oh right yes

+5

RIGHT SO THE END

SEE YOU NEXT TIME

 

 

 

Self-wetting: 82 x -5 = -415

Failing school : 7 x -5 = -35

NPC visit: 4 x -5 = -20

Passing Out: 259 x -5 = -1290

Accidental Deaths: 5 x -10 = -5

Social Worker Visit: 0 x -15 = 0

Birth: 10 x +5 = +50

Twin Birth: 4 x +10 = +40

Triplet Birth: 0 x +15 = 0

Quad Birth: 1 x +20 = +20

Fulfilling LTW: 3 x +40 = +120

5-star celebrity: 0 x +5 = 0

Honour roll: 0 x +5 = 0

Randomizing every LTW choice and trait (apart from the obligational insane trait) for a whole generation of children: 3 x +10 = +30

Portrait of the torch holders somewhere in the house: 4 x +5 = +20

Having the Torch Holder reach the top of a career: 1 x +10 = +10

Having a spouse reach the top of their career: 0 x +20 = 0

Every 100,000$: 3 x +20 = +60

TOTAL: -1450

P.S. I’m about to upload Dandruff if ANYBODY wants her