The SANE are a dying species

Posts tagged ‘sims 3’

4.9 – Bumblebee finally gets a win

HI DIANA

IT’S BEEN A LONG TIME

I FORGOT EVERYTHING

So how about uh you fill me in. All I remember is Angelica being freaky as fuck.

Oh well that’s nice.

Wait YOU’RE PREGNANT?

Diana: *mumbles something insulting*

Ah yeessss, I remember you had a monkey face Erika.

It seems times haven’t changed.

Ok no joking aside-

Nope still no difference.

Erika: SAFETY is an illusion

Esme was the prettiest of the twins.

Still monkey-faced.

YES THIS IS WHY DIANA IS PREGNANT.

Diana: Finally you’re back with the program.

It takes me a while you know, when months are spent in between updates. BUT THIS TIME. I HAVE GOTTEN MYSELF A COMPUTER UPGRADE.

*crinkets chirp*

Well to see if this upgrade actually makes a difference or not. With the sims game, it probably won’t because it’s coded to be fucked – or NO WAIT, sometimes the game actually agrees with me. It’s this SPECIFIC SAVE that is coded to be fucked.

ALSO

I got eye mods for the cats. Look at those eyeballs.

Hello yes, Emma, explain to me why Enzo is at school and not you.

Emma: Because it was my BIRTHDAY today

…oh right right, I ASK PATIENCE THANKS

RUN EMMA RUN, SAVE MY POINTS

Also Diana pick your monkey off the floor.

Diana: Don’t insult my children.

Rufus: ITS OKAY ESME BABY I GOT U

Lilipad: oiwqfjlkgjalsav

Yeah Lilipad is malfunctioning OFF TO RECHARGE YOU GO

Rufus: Ah fatherhood

Esme: Only eyes for meh daddy

The monkey twins creep me out

Like at this point I prefer Dandruff because she doesn’t cry in her dirty diaper

Dandruff: ERK stop trying to give me compliments it makes me sick.

Who at this point doesn’t know how to use a door to come INSIDE

Dandruff: That’s a little better

Rufus: I like this computer upgrade of yours. Gives me enough free will to be the daddy I always knew I could be.

And I forgot how pretty your eyes are

ENZO WELCOME BACK HOME

Enzo: Shhhh don’t make too much noise you’ll alert HER.

Who?

Enzo: HEEEEERRRRR

HER: chillldd, where did you go?

WOAH THERE

EMMA

EMMA

Emma: LISTEN WELL MY AUDIENCE

Lucifer: This should be interesting

Angelica: I didn’t have time to be young, why did I grow so old

I’m so ecstatic I forgot I had the Children Can mod

AND SHE HAS THE VIRTUOSO TRAIT SO

Emma: *plays sad dramatic music as Enzo dies*

Lucifer: I knew this would be worth it

-5

So that forced me to look at my points again. I’ve forgotten how I even gain points.

No Enzo, you’re supposed to yell at the toddler for waking you up.

Enzo: but it’s a toddler

LEMME TELL YOU ABOUT THE SHITS sims give about toddlers

Enzo: OK BUT WHAT IF IT BITES

Erika: hurrdduuuurrr

That does make sense

OH LOL LOL LOL

What is this now

Someone wants to take Dandruff out well then Mr.Andrew imma say yes

Bumblebee: Ok Dandy whatever, I’ve come to threaten to blackmail you for fun – what r u doing

Dandruff: Sorry pee spot I have a date

Bumblebee: NO BUT I HAVE AN INTERACTION IN QUEUE. HOW DARE YOU.

Oh shit Diana I was doing something what are you doing

Diana: This is me hating on you

Do you feel neglected? It’s only cause I know you have it in for me.

Jeez woman this is taking forever, I have places to BE.

Like right here.

Who dis boy.

Dis Andrew has ODDLY GREEN SKIN.

OH yas that’s why. Somebody is an Idanezy.

Dandruff: At this point EVERYONE is.

To prove to you that this is incest I pulled up the family tree. SEE I FOUND HIM. Calliope’s grandson, also lmao Mortimer’s son?? Who was ironically a potential spouse for Diana. So there ya go Dandruff he’s like your cousin. Sort of.

Andrew: BURRRRRPPPPP

Dandruff: Wow

Andrew: whew sorry about that OH HERE COMES ANOTHER ONE BURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRP

Dandruff: I’m very unattracted

Dandruff: So yeah you know before we take this palpitating relationship any further I have a son

Andrew: A what

Dandruff: And also a wife who would beat you up. A heads up.

It’s okay my boy at this point

Just leave

Andrew: SO I THOUGHT ABOUT IT FOR FIVE SECONDS AND I’M WILLING TO SEE THIS THROUGH

Dandruff: why am I included in this heartfart

SO I see nothing has changed here

Diana: Your computer upgrade isn’t worth shit

WHY DO YOU INSULT ME SO

And did I just hear a monkey sound

Erika: Wasn’t meh 😉

I SWEAR GUYS I DID

Lilipad: I find your behavior towards my daughters inacceptable

Enzo why are you not sleeping

Enzo: but the cat has been meowing ALL NIGHT

Azazel: I take pride in my work

Bumblebee: I FOUND YOU FINALLY

Enzo: oh crap

Azazel: I also stink. A lot.

Enzo: *uses passing out to cancel BBee’s action*

Bumblebee: DARN HONEY TRAP I SWEAR. PEOPLE GETTING OUT OF INTERACTIONS IS MAKING ME LONELY.

-5

Bumblebee: SEE IM NOT KIDDING. WHY CAN’T THEY LET ME BE AN ASSHOLE. A LEAST FOR A MOMENT.

OH LALA

WHAT

AN

OUTFIT

Diana: You’re not even worthy of a response

You beautiful thing you, Enzo and you are the only worthy children.

Emma: Please I’M trying to do something here.

Bumblebee: MY—DA—Y—–IS NOT —–GOING WELL

This is mildly amusing

As long as this ends with you going to bed

I’m okay with it.

Enzo: PLEASE I DON’T WANT TO PASS OUT AGAIN

Have pity on my Enzo monkey

Diana: Alright fine, I’ll tune you up, but know that the game canceled this interaction three times so you better appreciate this.

I don’t know what my game has against sim-robot interactions

Bumblebee: EXCUSE ME? I am not some BIMBO you can just TUNE UP to bribe my friendship. My friendship requires that I TROLL you first and that requirement hasn’t been met so NO, I refuse this TUNE UP

Lilipad: (somewhere takes offense as she takes care of the children)

Diana: Well I got no qualms over this. And my unborn baby is saying I should annihilate you where you stand.

Bumblebee: I don’t think that’s your foetus talking

Diana: Well that’s true I am the Empress of Evil.

Brittney: …

Bumblebee: > 😦  WHAT NEVER SEEN A SMOKING ROBOT BEFORE? I swear everybody judges me around here

Brittney: Modern furniture sur is talkative

Enzo: Hi Bumble, did you know it was my birthday today? Hope you got me present

Bumblebee:

Bumbleebee: Oh no that means it’s my last chance to successfully troll him! Oh I’ll come up with a present alright, yes indeed……hehehe

You know I don’t see that happening since you’re stuck in a never ending malfunctioning glitch and you REFUSE to accept help.

EMMA

Emma: What!? Go see the toilet and RECONSIDER your reaction

Okay agreed

-5

Lilipad: Dear you see over there? That’s pre-birthday jitters right there

More like BAD FREE WILL

-5

OK QUICK BIRTHDAY BEFORE THE KIDS GO TO SCHOOL

Oh hay Catarina, here to see your grandchild’s birthday?

Bumblebee: YOU’RE A HORRIBLE BIRTHDAY PLANNER. I didn’t get to plan ANYTHING.

Plus like half the family isn’t here but time went way faster than I expected and I wanted to give this boy a day off

Enzo: Aw thanks

Lilipad: NO I’M MISSING THE PARTY

Rufus: Lol I don’t know where I’m going anymore

Enzo: nobody told me growing up KILLED YOUR BLADDER

-5

Emma: Somebody take a pic quick! This is a face he’ll want to remember

Right right let me get a close up

THERE WE GO

BEAUTIFUL

Enzo: I hate you two

What a supportive family

Rufus still booing his children

I might tear up

Not like the MONKEYS could even bother to show up

God

I can’t even LOOK at them

Emma please, you need to calm down on the PARTYING it’s hazardous to your health…and my points.

-5

Enzo: WHAT

Aw babe lmao I’m sorry

You KNOW I can’t resist guys

These pictures are gold

And I think Enzo does noodle best so far

Shiiit guys you should see this, this boy is gorgeous!

Wait I can just share a picture…

THERE HE IS

Look at this Lilac boy

You’re giving me Desmond vibes

You know your uncle whom I adore?

Except you’re a slob and now unflirty

Look at this hunk. Got his dad’s body sliders.

His traits do him no good, but he might just be able to make it on LOOKS alone 😉

Diana: How can I feed this child when it’s in the way!??

I—uh, well I mean it’s your LOGIC

You know I can’t differentiate between the twins on my own yet. Doesn’t help that I don’t play this save for months on end.

But I remember saying Esme was the most tolerable of the two.

Still looks like a monkey to me.

Birthday boy strikes!

And fails so miserably he clips through the floor

-5

Maybe I should’ve sent you to school afterall

EMMA not you tooo

Rufus:  (wailing outside) I GOT DEMOTED

Well serves you right for not using your free will like a non conventional sim!

You seem to be having fun

How is our mother to be?

Diana: She’s having fun

I figured as much

Hoo lala! Guys! Guys!

DANDRUFF is about to move OUT

I think her age got reset for some reason! Cause she’s down to one day HOOYEAH FINALLY

Dandruff: God calm down will you, I already have a bad enough headache as it is

A few real life weeks later…

(opens my game)

Oh but WHAT IS THIS

A lonely GLITCH

Not to worry she’s a toad

And about to hit the road

Pretty SURE free will doesn’t work

In this save anymore

-5

If I can’t see him it doesn’t count right? RIGHT?

-5

At least he TRIES you know

More than I can say about MOST

Giving me the need to FAST FORWARD HERE FOLKS

Look at dat chin though

-5

OH OH LOOK AT THAT

Maybe Free Will just needed some WARMING UP

Yes let’s amp that HOPE meter up a bit

OH MY WHAT’S GOING ON HERE

Bumblebee: AHHAHAHAHA TAKE THAT FINALLY YOUR BLUE ASS IS DOWN

Enzo: SCREW THIS I HATE BEING A TEEN

Enzo: NOW GET OUT I NEED TO PEE

Bumblebee: You mean cry over your defeat

Enzo: OUT

Bumblebee: I love winning

Dandruff: GOD I HATE NOISE. AND THIS HOUSE. AND MY LACK OF RENDER

It’s okay doll I got you

WITH A GET OUT OF MY HOUSE CAKE

Dandruff: We literally just hit the midnight mark

COME NOW

If you cause a fire I will fuck you up I swear

Dandruff: WOULDN’T THAT be something

EMMA WHY ARE YOU SCREWING with this happy moment

-5

Perfect ur ugly, you got the hate outdoors trait, out YOU GO

Dandruff: Oh NO YOU DON’T. You owe me a decent makeover

*grumbles but opens CAS anyways*

Isn’t she JUST GORGEOUS

Dandruff: OI

SO there you go!

Dandruff cleaned up her act and went in town to give me a GOOD GENETIC pool

Dandruff: haha you wish, I’m going to go out there and LIVE

You’re pretty, leave before I change my mind

Dandruff: As if that would change ANYTHING about this really

DON’T TEMPT ME

I could have you stay in the torture shed

You’d pay in SCREAMS OF ANGUISH

Bumblebee: I’m going to miss the only other passive aggressive person in this house

OOF this hurts

40K

Out the window

But hey satisfaction of checking that KICK OUT box

Heeeeeyyy DIANA

Isn’t this like your purple haired

Older sister

Diana: HahhAHAHAHAHAHAA

Dandruff pulled out some MYSTERY super powers and teleported here

SO I think

This is where she lives now

I aint gonna wait around to see if she renders

Rufus: HAHAHA son did you get beat up by the robot again

Enzo: ZZZZZZZONE TIME ZZZZZZZZ

-5

Diana: IM REAL TIRED OF PREGNANT. ALL I DO IS SLEEP.

I feel you hon

Diana: THIS IS MY LAST BABY

Yes I agree lol

GOOD DANDRUFF

Get the romance on

Man you monkeys are boring

Good pic

Ok bye

DID YOU GIVE BIRTH ALREADY

Diana: (gives me the stink eye)

Sorry can’t see it amongst all this unrenderedness

While I wait for a baby birth to end this chapter

Let me just

HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHA

EW

Sweet lady ITS ONLY BEEN a few hours

But hey if you’re going to start baby making now that’s cool

Can’t wait for your fiancé to get a face

Goddamn lady you’ve been pregnant for MONTHS

Diana: Don’t PROJECT your absence from this save on me

Ouch

Lol she just wanted baby money from old dannybrow here

Sorry hon he’s BROKE

Oh hey what’s this

Diana: ME SCREAMING WASN’T ENOUGH?

Diana: WHERE’S RUFUS

Uhhhhhhhhhhhh

Off to get himself

A quickie cleanse?

Diana: aoigjalkgalkhaga

Angelica: heyyyyyyyyy im cute right

Nice butthole

Lol uh

Emma?

Emma: no

Alright you know what if school is where it’s at

You stay there

WHAT SHALL THE BABY BE

FIND OUT

NEXT TIME

HAHAHA

Im kidding

I aint gonna cliffhanger this *snort*

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

He’s

The first Normal skinned but

SHIT

He isn’t

The last child

Diana: Excuse me

So guys this is EGBERT

He’s easily impressed and a light sleeper, and his fav color is white

Diana: WHAT DO YOU MEAN ISN’T THE LAST

Im sorry but like both you AND rufus have that wish for a baby girl and I need to MAKE THAT A REALITY. It’s in the rules

Diana: Shit

I feel you

Also I think Egbert is a vampire????

But he must be glitched cause it AINT showing up

WELL HERE GOES PEEPS

Oh right yes

+5

RIGHT SO THE END

SEE YOU NEXT TIME

 

 

 

Self-wetting: 82 x -5 = -415

Failing school : 7 x -5 = -35

NPC visit: 4 x -5 = -20

Passing Out: 259 x -5 = -1290

Accidental Deaths: 5 x -10 = -5

Social Worker Visit: 0 x -15 = 0

Birth: 10 x +5 = +50

Twin Birth: 4 x +10 = +40

Triplet Birth: 0 x +15 = 0

Quad Birth: 1 x +20 = +20

Fulfilling LTW: 3 x +40 = +120

5-star celebrity: 0 x +5 = 0

Honour roll: 0 x +5 = 0

Randomizing every LTW choice and trait (apart from the obligational insane trait) for a whole generation of children: 3 x +10 = +30

Portrait of the torch holders somewhere in the house: 4 x +5 = +20

Having the Torch Holder reach the top of a career: 1 x +10 = +10

Having a spouse reach the top of their career: 0 x +20 = 0

Every 100,000$: 3 x +20 = +60

TOTAL: -1450

P.S. I’m about to upload Dandruff if ANYBODY wants her

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4.8 – Lilipad officially claims motherhood

You see, my excuse this time, is that I actually die periodically every few months and come back to life only to write a new ISBI chapter. I swear to you this is true.

YOU WERE SO CLOSE

Urm

Something is wrong in this room

YOU HAVE LIGHTS NOW YOU CAN WAKE UP

-5

….

Lilipad: I’m just here to make sure these two don’t hurt my Enzo.

Dandruff: I’m here for the new lamps.

Bumblebee: I WILL GET YOU CHILD.

Let’s watch the child do the sleep too

I MEAN SINCE EVERYONE ELSE IS DOING IT

Bumblebee: You are a worthy unscarable opponent. But I will not give up.

Enzo: LALALALALALA *victory dance*

There is no birth happening in this household. Not with the cats, nor with the bots, or Diana LIKE UM

*two seconds later, gets a pop-up of some townie giving birth*

THAT SHOULDN’T AFFECT ME

Lilipad: Children are so beautiful. AND ANOTHER ONE WILL JOIN US SOON.

Bumblebee: I’m stronger than you are.

Diana: LILIPAD. CHESS. NOW. I WANT TO PLAY.

Lilipad: The mother beckons.

Diana: Oh

Lilipad: What

Diana: Got this like weird…twinge in my belly…

*five seconds later*

Lilipad: I HAVE THE ROBONANNY TRAIT I CAN HELP

Enzo: Mom?

Diana: SCREAAAMMMSS

Enzo: Oh my god mom! You’re awesome! Keep up the good work!

Diana: I will spoil this child rotten after this I promise

A NORMAL SKIN COLORED BABY—

Wait

*game makes baby switch to green*

I guess this is a GREEN baby then, yes

Anywho

WELCOME Erika Idanezy!

Fav color is BLACK (like sweet Emma)

And she’s insane and easily impressed

She’s also a vampire- no a genie- NO SHES BOTH. A hybrid! But primarily a vampire.

OH BUT WAIT THESE WERE TWINS

WELCOME Esme Idanezy!

We’ve got another LILAC lover

She’s insane and good.

And she’s a genie-no a vampire- NO SHE’S ALSO BOTH. We got twin hybrids here. But she’s apparently more of a genie. COOL.

+10

Rufus: TWINS?

*shakes head*

-5

Rufus: WE ARE OUT OF FOOD, I’M STARVING, oh hey son what are you doing

Enzo: Just grabbing another cake slice ignore me.

Enzo: *puts it down*

What are you doing bud

Enzo: I’m creating a CAKE MOSAIC

How about you just EAT the cake

Enzo: Fine

Rufus: Oh hey look a random piece of cake lying around.

Enzo: My father would not survive without me I’m sure of it.

Lilipad: I FEEL IM ABOUT TO ENTER A WHOLE NEW WORLD

Dandruff: About time

I DIDN’T REALIZE YOU COULD JUST BUY THESE CHARGER THINGS. I thought you had to go into the future and stuff *mumbes*

Enzo: FEAR ME

Bumblebee: somehow I cannot get the drop on this kid. My circuits must be malfunctioning.

Enzo: I AM THE KING. NOTHING CAN STAND AGAINST ME.

Bumblebee: OH FUCK HE HEARD ME

Legit cute child.

Enzo: Are you talking about ME?

Rufus: HAHA you should’ve known it would come out of the sushi. Even I knew that.

Bumblebee: I want a salary

Diana: I’m regretting inviting you to chess.

Bumblebee: I AM UNDERPAID aka not at all.

Diana: Tell you what, plant a money tree and you get 30%

Bumblebee: THOSE ARE REAL

Diana: Yeah sure my grandma’s neighbor had one.

Rufus: That lady is still trying to eat the octopus. Why don’t we ever get octopus in this kitchen? I bet that would taste delicious.

Bumblebee: FORTY-FOUR LUMBER JACKS!

Rufus: HOLY-

Bumblebee: Is my scaring ability only good on ADULTS?

Enzo: *in the background* Lalalalalalala

 

This chapter is being done with so many shameful monthly intervals that I constantly need to check up on the children, like yes, Emma is still cute as a button.

Dandruff: You know what’s amusing? Apart from the fact that I’m the only one taking care of the kids?

Yes, you’re taking care of poor Emma. She clearly looks satisfied from your help.

Dandruff: It’s that yellow robot.

BUMBLEBEE, you going for Enzo again? It’s a fool’s quest my man.

Bumblebee: NOT if I gather enough energy!

You are not blasting Diana’s only son.

Bumblebee: uhhh no no of course not

I mean LOOK AT HIM

Enzo: Ma said the robot was supposed to be high tech, I think she messed up some of its wiring though.

Bumblebee: EXCU-

Diana: DON’T BADMOUTH ME BOY

Dandruff: oh NOW everyone wants to take care of the babies

Lilipad: I WAS SLEEPING. I am done sleeping. Give me the Erika.

Rufus: Dandruff heh, ah, um, I just want to spend time with my newborns. Since I’m their DAD and you’re just their Aunt.

Dandruff: well TOO BAD. I got here first.

Rufus: I thought you grounded her

Lilipad: I DID

Dandruff: Oh my god you guys. Diana had TWINS. Esme is right in front of you.

Rufus: LOOK AT ME, SUCH DISTRACTION

Lilpad: Good good I just need to swatch baby Erika…

Dandruff: You guys are horrible

Rufus: You’re just saying that cause YOU DON’T ACTUALLY BELIEVE IT

Diana: Please tell me you guys are NOT neglecting Esme

Dandruff: I’m out of here. Too much drama.

Diana: It’s okay Esme I got you

Bumblebee: OH MY GOD. WHY HASN’T ANYONE TERMINATED THE KIDS YET.

Lilipad: It wasn’t my fault master I swear

Lilipad: BAD RUFUS. Neglecting Esme FOR SHAME

Rufus: WAIT WHAT

Bumblebee: heeeeeeeeeeeh NICE

Diana: You will have a good upbringing Esme I promise

 

So like Esme’s neglect is a REAL THING.

Somehow Diana has a full relationship with Erika but she’s in the red with Esme??

Also somehow friendly interactions make it WORSE??

GAAMMMEEEE

There really seems to be an infestation of fairies.

-5

ACK RUFUS NO

-5

Enzo, I checked, you have a door to your room. You can sleep in your own bed.

Rufus was heading for Erika, then he got attacked with multiple PEE YOURSELF glitches, which I will count as only ONE fail.

-5

Lilipad: *whispers* I think Esme may be harboring negative feelings

Enzo: I just wanted to take a nice nap. In a clean environnement.

Rufus: heh…heh…Look Esme darling, I love you. Plz don’t curse me again

Guyyysss

She’s insane and GOOD. This child has the GOOD trait. Why do you seem afraid of her.

OH HEY LOOK

Kitties

You have become grandparents

Angelica: O-O……BUT I AM STILL YOUNG

Poor grandma seems to be taking the news harshly

Lilipad get the broom

There’s trash in the bathroom

Dandruff: OI

-5

OH LOOK Esme is neglected. Again.

Rufus: It’s just-Lilipad has Erika-Emma was on the floor-and

SHUSH

Lilipad: GUESS WHAT. It’s Birthday time, AND since master is at work I GET TO DO THE HONORS

Rufus: Wait where’s Diana

Bumblebee: TROLOLOL what a defective robot

Lilipad: Don’t see her out the window…

Lilipad: TOO BAD HERE WE GO ERIKA

Enzo: Birthday?? Already?? Nobody warns me D:

Lilipad: PERFECT. NOW IT’S YOUR TIME ESME.

Welp my heir tried to make it in time for baby birthdays…

-5

Rufus: *making caterpillar jokes again*

Lilipad: I love being a mother

AND HERE’S ERIKA

Ahem

Uh

Is it me or does she look like a monkey

So yahhhh, mum’s hair and dad’s eyes!

……

HERE’S ESME

Some strange eyeballs and mum’s hair. Erika is officially a vampire and Esme a genie.

I’m sorry these genes make me sad. WE GUN NEED MORE BABIES GUYS.

Rufus: I WAS PASSED OUT, SLEEPING PEACEFULLY ON THE FLOOR

Gee thanks -5

Diana: I WAS UPSTAIRS, sleeping in MY BED

This child has a mighty pair of lungs

Bumblebee: We could always burn it

Esme: I just wanted…to watch tv D:

You know

She’s not THAT bad. I can see Rufus in her.

WAIT

HER EYES ARE GLOWING

THEY WERE NOT GLOWING BEFORE

Rufus: Sooo your mom and I are going to make even MOAR siblings for you

Enzo: Goodness gracious

Dandruff: Please just stop while you’re ahead

Diana: I fed the kid. Went to sleep. AND ITS GHASTLY SCREAMS WOKE ME AGAIN.

Rufus: Is it really ours

Dandruff: I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU TWO

Dandruff: YOU CREATED A MONSTER. SHAME ON YOU. SHHHHAAAMMMMEEEE

Diana: Watch your mouth BEFORE I DO SOMETHING I WON’T REGRET

Dandruff: I hate this house

Diana: Oh my god you are such a drama queen

-5

Esme: There is an eternal sadness in my soul

Lilipad: Master please don’t leave me alone

Diana: THIS IS YOUR REASON FOR EXISTING. HAVE FUN.

GAZE FOR THE LAST TIME ON THIS-

Emma

Emma smile plz

Emma: NO

Emma plz, this is your last day as a toddler

 

THERE WE GO

Emma: Can someone change my diaper now

ANYTHING FOR YOU DEAR

OH GOOD LORD

Dandruff made it to the school bus this time. WE THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME.

Enzo: Fudge I usually nap on here

Bumblebee: I’m the only one of any use here. I mean, I have to TUNE myself

Be honest

It’s not like you do much of anything anymore

Bumblebee: I’m sorry my ears turned off what did you say?

NEVERMIND

Erika is…

Still dUNNO

MAYBE she’s growing me

*squints*

ESME

Is growing on me though, she really is

ENZO COME ON

-5

Ok from now on each time you pass out imma give an innocent bystander a makeover.

SHAZAM

His outfit was actually not bad so only his hairdo

Lilipad: Drink lots of milk child, you’re going to need all this calcium for your growth spurt

Esme: *ETERNAL SAD FACE*

DANDRUFF IDANEZY

-5

Have you ever heard of inter dimensional travel. That doesn’t count as an accidental death right? I wouldn’t lose any points over it

OH WHAT’S THIS

HOW ODD

A RANDOM SCREENSHOT, for no reason

Bumblebee: Oh god birthdays again. These things grow like WEEDS

I know it’s great FINALLY EMMA CHILD

Lilipad: Are you ready Emma TO EMBARK ON A JOURNEY MY DAUGHTER

Emma: Just as long as I finally eat cake

Rufus: *mumbling* but she’s MY daughter

Emma: I doth believe the growing process reverse…my arm

Rufus: *LOUD SNORTING*

Dandruff: omfg what is in that cake

 

ANYWAY LOOK SHE GREW

With the animal lover trait. Well she’s going to be a happy camper with all these cats.

She LOOKS BEAUTIFUL too

Emma: Of course I did

Enzo: Oh shit, another one as tall as me

Lilipad: ENZO LANGUAGE around my beautiful daughter

Emma: I like this attention

Enzo: You’re beautiful daughter derped out in front of the fridge. Nobody can eat anymore.

LOOK I MADE HER A ROOM

I remembered this time like a good watcher

OH WHAT IS THIS

Could there actually have been a point to that random screenshot

Diana: IM DONE AFTER THIS

*singing* BABY WHY YOU CRRYIINNNGGGGG

-5

Dandruff: Are you drunk or something

I don’t know anymore

She’s got the legendary pouty face down but its mixed in with some monkey

Dandruff: Just because you don’t like Erika, she’s now my absolute fav. WE GOTTA STICK TOGETHER

I never SAID I didn’t like her

Current favorite child: EMMA

DON’T DERP ON ME KID

Rufus: She’s gonna derp

DON’T DO IT

You DERPED how could you

-5

SINK INTO THE FLOOR. FEEL THE PUNISHMENT.

Look at these two monkeys that my heir produced

Erika: -and then I ask myself what is the meaning of food and breathing and living, is it good for people to SEE what if they all BLED-

Esme: You think too much

OKAY

I am done with this chapter have Angelica showing you all the privies

Angelica: I SLEEP WITH MY EYES OPEN. I am not a weak grandma. I SEE LADYBUG

 

 

Self-wetting: 80 x -5 = -405

Failing school : 7 x -5 = -35

NPC visit: 4 x -5 = -20

Passing Out: 249 x -5 = -1240

Accidental Deaths: 5 x -10 = -5

Social Worker Visit: 0 x -15 = 0

Birth: 9 x +5 = +45

Twin Birth: 4 x +10 = +40

Triplet Birth: 0 x +15 = 0

Quad Birth: 1 x +20 = +20

Fulfilling LTW: 3 x +40 = +120

5-star celebrity: 0 x +5 = 0

Honour roll: 0 x +5 = 0

Randomizing every LTW choice and trait (apart from the obligational insane trait) for a whole generation of children: 3 x +10 = +30

Portrait of the torch holders somewhere in the house: 4 x +5 = +20

Having the Torch Holder reach the top of a career: 1 x +10 = +10

Having a spouse reach the top of their career: 0 x +20 = 0

Every 100,000$: 3 x +20 = +60

TOTAL: -1340

 

4.7 – At least Bumblebee doesn’t break hot tubs

I will not give a stupid excuse like that I’ve been hardcore working on my legacy

Look an update.

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I see you brought a friend over…and hypnotized him.

Dandruff: he followed me home and he was pissing me off.

Lilypad: I has a cute baby in my arms cute cute cute

Enzo: *wondering whether his mother is a robot*

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What kind of bladder do you have Dandruff

Dandruff: It was the sunlight

Geesus

-5

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LilIpad: WHAT KIND OF IRRESPONSIBLE CHILD ARE YOU NOT GOING TO SCHOOL AND STEALING ENZO FROM ME GIVE ME ENZO

Dandruff: Oh my god are you serious

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Rufus: He is mine right? He doesn’t seem to be the right the kind of blue…

Diana: Yes yes he’s yours, now get your butt over here, the shower is free ;P

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Diana: It’s time. Are you ready.

Rufus: *gets up from toilet* Yes.

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Rufus: HAHA HE LOOKS LIKE A BLUE CATERPILLAR

Diana: Are you laughing at my son?

Rufus: …no

Diana: I’m going to beat you up

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Diana: *tickles Rufus* You were warned!

Rufus: Aaaahahaha stop!

Enzo: I grew up…but you know whatever

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Lilac is going to be weird on this child.

Mama’s eyes and hair! And occult state. Really only inherited skin and gender from your dad didn’t you?

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Vampires always look better out of CAS.

Why so sad child?

Enzo: Stinky diaper 😦

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Lilipad: I GOTS YOU CHILD

Enzo: Smoke??

Cédric: I so approve of this, give me more nephews!

Diana: Haha brother go away

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Azazel: Bro bro what are you doing

Lucifer: Imitating you

Azazel: Bro no

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Lucifer: Bet you can’t do better

Azazel: *sighs* I’m not even going to try

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But

But James

You got married to Lady Wolff

Why are you with Lindsay? You know I was joking when I said you were a player right?

screenshot-14

Lilipad: Enzo is in MY arms go away

Diana: Just take Enzo, you’re his daddy and it’s just a robot

Rufus: I would but uh, I’m feeling a little weak from hunger see…

screenshot-15

Look at this cutie pie teaching himself how to talk!

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DID YOU JUST BREAK MY HOT TUB

Lilipad: I was just – I needed power – I mean no one uses it

REPAIR MY HOT TUB

screenshot-17

Lilipad: oops

Did you just set fire to my hot tub

Lilipad how

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Diana: LETS NOT USE THE HOT TUB WATER. Die fire

Lilipad: OH MY GOD WHAT IS HAPPENING

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Um James??? When did you get here??

God this is such a mess

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Diana: If you set fire to my hot tub again I will use my stink force and throw you in do you understand

Lilipad: yes master sorry master

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Diana: I need to upgrade this robot pronto

Lilipad: *distant electronic screaming*

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Dandruff: I opened my bed because I’m about to pass out, but I forgot why so I’m going to go take a bath now.

You don’t have the absent minded trait. IF YOU PASS OUT ON ME-

screenshot-23

-5

Hey look something cute!

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Enzo: Ahaha my hand is stuck OuO

…………no it’s too early stay cute and innocent and not crazy

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Dandruff: My frowny sad face is better

Enzo: no mine!

Dandruff: …okay fine yours is cuter

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Lilipad: I have complaints

Diana: Just play

Lilipad: There is not enough Enzo to go around

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It’s okay we’re working on it

😛

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Lilipad: SO I HEARD you were making a new Enzo

Diana: An Enzette!

Oh my god no not calling the baby Enzette

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Excuse me

JANIS BUFORD

Stop eating my invisible crystal plant. STOP IT.

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Poor Janis Buford.

She’s not having a good day, what with being a zombie, having her midsection cut in half, and me yelling at her.

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But have no fear Jung Cahill has appeared. Maybe he can make her feel better about her disproportionate body sections and sunken cheeks.

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The rejection hits him hard.

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Diana doesn’t go to work anymore because of her pregnancies, but it’s okay.

This is why I made her emperor of evil before babies.

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Jacklyne: YOUR PREGNANCY IS A LIE WOMAN

Diana: Shut up you ate my plants. You don’t get to have an OPINION.

I swear she’s in her third trimester.

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Diana got singed while reverse engeneering a nanite…

Looks like it was good for the baby though!

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Lilipad: THERE YOU ARE ENZO. I found you. Bad child. If creator knew I’d lost you she’d reprogram me

Enzo: oops

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Lilipad: Child! You still don’t do your homework! You need to up those grades child!

Dandruff: Hey! Mind you, I’m older than you are! Who are you calling a child!?

Lilipad: You’re grounded

Dandruff: Are u serious

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Lucifer: I made a vomit! Isn’t it pretty?

Lilipad: I’m busy feline

Lucifer: Nobody plays my games

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Diana: Lilipad stop standing around and put my child to bed.

Lilipad: Dandruff go to bed

Diana : I MEANT ENZO

Lilipad: Ok fine sorry my bad

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Diana: AHHH MY STOMACH

Dandruff: OH MY GOD IS IT THE BABY

Diana: Lmao no I’m just hungry

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Diana: Jk it really is the baby O-O

Dandruff: Yeah ok, not fooling me twice

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Dandruff: Like look at that you’re such a faker haha

Diana: You’re dead meat once this baby comes out

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It really was a girl this time! Though instead of calling her Enzette…

Welcome Emma Idanezy!

She’s an insane virtuoso, who likes dark wave music, grilled salmon and the color black (oooh that’s new)

And she’s another blue vampire XP

+5

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There go the baby points

-5

screenshot-44

Rufus: ENZO LOOK DID YOU SEE YOU HAVE A SISTER ISNT IT EXCITING

Enzo: but what is it

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Lilipad: Oh you poor child. Here girls go in the pink cribs

EXCUSE ME

There are no gender stereotypes here put her back in her color coded crib

screenshot-46

Dandruff: I’m so done with school. I’ll just drink my day away if you don’t mind

I do

GO TO SCHOOL

screenshot-47

Dandruff: *attempts to sneak past lilipad*

Lilipad: EXCUSE ME. Did you not hear me when I said you were grounded. No leaving the house.

Dandruff: Well I mean if the robot insists.

*facepalm*

screenshot-48

ARE YOU EXCITED CHILD

You and your sister get your birthday tomorrow!

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Rufus: We’re so pretty in pictures

Diana: SO like our babies are growing up, we should make more. *has an actual wish*

Dandruff: Please don’t

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Sorry Dandruff, but I can’t refuse a wish 😛

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Diana: Hm I shall ponder this drawing with my elbow as I run out of the bedroom

*ahem*

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Birthday time!

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Child you

Poor

Poor

Child

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He actually grew up pretty nice! Even with the couch potato trait lol.

The kid’s got his dad’s body. (Yeah I got body sliders a while back.)

screenshot-55

Rufus: Haha another caterpillar birthday!

Diana: I swear I’m going to kick you

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Emma grew up!

With RHAM’S HAIR. It lives on :O

I’m not too sure where she got the white eyes, but…DIVERSITY

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Child, I wanted to take a cute picture. What is this face

Emma: I’m making my cute face HAHA

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Emma heads off to skill like a boss

screenshot-59

While Diana mercilessly destroys her son at rock paper scissors to get him to make more sad faces

Enzo: MA you never told me you could have reaper!

Diana: I can’t tell you everything now kid

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Diana: NO I don’t want to talk to you right now I need to save my robot before my husband decapitates it

Lilipad: Decapitation??

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Diana: Oooh you’re actually good at this

Rufus: good enough to hire?

Diana: Maybe I could hire you as eye candy in my lab 😛

Lilipad: IT TICKLES

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I SMELL BABIES

Diana: I smell leftover cake UGH

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Boy I made a bed for you

Why won’t you sleep in it??

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Oh

I see

A lack of a door may cause some difficulty…

screenshot-65

Lilipad: I will teach you to walk like a robot child

Emma: But im not a robot

Lilipad: Robots are better you want to be a robot.

Lucifer: Hello brother. I am gracing you with my presence.

Azazel: I can do without thank you very much

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Lucifer: FOR THAT I SHALL EAT YOUR SOUL

Lilipad: why did you sit back on your bum emma baby

Emma: because I dun wanna robot walk I wanna butt walk

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Azazel: BUT THEN AZAZEL ATE LUCIFER

Lucifer: my life flashes underneath the skill bar

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Diablo: Copy my greeting genie or I shall alienate you

Rufus: ….*stretches weirdly in response*

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Lilipad.

Lilipad: PREVENTIVE MEASURES. By draining it there’s less chance of it breathing fire again

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OKAY SO

Lilipad bugged out. I can’t seem to have anyone interact with her and she can’t interact with anyone else. I tried resetting her, or modifying her in CAP to see if it would change anything and it didn’t. She’s become utterly useless now.

But I still kind of like her, so I’ll keep her…BUT I still kind of need a bot for Diana’s wishes…

screenshot-72

SO WELCOME BUMBLEBEE

Lilipad: I wonder if I can still fold clothes

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And on top of that he’s HIGH TECH while Lilipad’s still AVERAGE

UPGRADE WOO

Bumblebee: Life…I am…life?

Lilipad: I’m going to miss folding clothes.

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Diana: Here take all these random trait chips I had in my pocket. PLUS THE LIMITLESS LEARNING. I WAS going to give it to Lilipad but….

Lilipad: *sad face*

Bumblebee: *gets the traits, A.I angler, limitless learning, competent cleaner, and sinister circuits*

screenshot-75

Diana: where do you think you’re going

Dandruff: um school?

Diana: NICE TRY GIRL.

Dandruff: This is actually starting to get annoying

screenshot-76

Lilipad: UM WHY CAN I NOT HOLD THE EMMA

I told you. You glitched.

Lilipad: BUT

You can’t interact with anyone anymore. Sorry Lilipad. Maybe you’ll unglitch one day.

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Diana: At least we can still play chess. You’re the only one who actually poses a challenge sometimes.

Lilipad: DO YOU THINK I COULD STILL COOK?

Diana: You’ve never cooked Lilipad

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Emma: I SEE YOU. I CAN SEE U 😀

Hi cutie!

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Bumblebee: HMPH. No wonder this house is a mess! The EX-ROBOT just played games all day long. *off to make bed*

Lilipad: I don’t like him >_>

Diana : At least he does the work though and he hasn’t blown up my hot tub yet.

Lilipad: :O

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Lilipad: THIS IS PAINFUL. Plz do something watcher ;-;

SIGH OK

Imma try something okay. I’ll move you out for like 2min, save you in the bin and put you back.

I didn’t wanna do it cause it took so much effort, BUT LET’S SEE IF IT WORKS.

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So don’t be fooled by Bumblebee trying to scare the oil out of Lilipad

IT DIDN’T WORK

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*basically makes a carbon copy of her*

Diana: MAINTENANCE IS DONE. Almost like new Lilipad! Next gen quality not bad if I do say so myself.

Lilipad: My trait chips have mysteriously disappeared

Diana: Yes let me just quickly make you a competent cleaner and robo nanny again…

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HELLO ENZO ITTY BITTY BOY. What are you doing AND WHAT IS THAT

Enzo: We’re hiding from the mean robot

Bumblebee: LITTLE CHILD. WHERE R U. I just wanted to give you a quick scare to reset your neurons. Neuron resetting is good for a child.

screenshot-84

Rufus: Poor baby! I thought the robot was supposed to change your diaper.

Emma: SHE ABANDONNED ME

Bumblebee: I will find you child. You cannot escape me forever.

Enzo: yes we caaannn

screenshot-85

I BET YOU

Enzo gets his cute sad faces from his pa

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It’s confirmed

Emma inherited them as well 😀

screenshot-87

Ignore the chopping off of Emma’s head

BUT DOES IT LOOK like Enzo and Emma have different skin colors?

If so that’s coooooool

My genetics mod might be working

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OH HEY LOOK

Confirmed pregnancy after a 3hr waiting time!

Diana: And guess what? IT GONNA BE ANOTHER GIRL I SWEAR

We’ll see. Who knows, you might get TWINS fertility

screenshot-89

WHAT ABOUT YOU RUFUS

Rufus: I’m too tired to register what happened. GOD ONE BABY IS SO TIRING. I might pass out

OH PLZ DON’T

You’re good now, Lilipad has the robo nanny chip again!

screenshot-90

Diana: As a reward for being an awesome dad, let me help you get to bed…

Bumblebee: I FOUND YOU CHILD

screenshot-91

Bumblebee: Oh you’re…busy. I’ll just wait.

Enzo: See! I told you Cuddles!

IM STILL NOT SURE ABOUT THE IF. Emma spawned one too…so far harmless…hopefully they don’t grow up…

screenshot-92

T_T

He got up to go pee

-5

screenshot-93

Diana: WHATEVER. ILL take care of crying Emma while you PLAY

Bumblebee: Sounds good.

Lilipad: Oh wait I’ll help with the Emma-

Bumblebee: NO STAY CATCH IT

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Diana: Look at me Emma. Mother needs to apologize for making useless robots WHO LET YOU ROT IN YOUR DIAPER

Lilipad: IM SORRY. IM BEING KEPT AGAINST MY WILL

Bumblebee: *distant laugh*

screenshot-95

Baskets: HIT AND RUN HIT AND RUN

Dandruff: Get out of the way road kill

Rufus: aaahhhhhzzzzzzzzzz

-5

screenshot-96

OH LOOK AT THE LILAC CHILD

-5

It must be a sign. That fairy is your soulmate.

Enzo: WAIT WHAT

screenshot-97

DID I STUTTER

Meet Shalonda

screenshot-98

NO BUT DID I STUTTER

She’s like a REALLY distant cousin in James’ line BUT AT THIS POINT THERE’S NO GOING AROUND IT.

 

Ok I’m going to stop it here and post this OVERDUE update

 

Self-wetting: 78 x -5 = -390

Failing school : 7 x -5 = -35

NPC visit: 4 x -5 = -20

Passing Out: 238 x -5 = -1190

Accidental Deaths: 5 x -10 = -50

Social Worker Visit: 0 x -15 = 0

Birth: 9 x +5 = +45

Twin Birth: 3 x +10 = +30

Triplet Birth: 0 x +15 = 0

Quad Birth: 1 x +20 = +20

Fulfilling LTW: 3 x +40 = +120

5-star celebrity: 0 x +5 = 0

Honour roll: 0 x +5 = 0

Randomizing every LTW choice and trait (apart from the obligational insane trait) for a whole generation of children: 3 x +10 = +30

Portrait of the torch holders somewhere in the house: 4 x +5 = +20

Having the Torch Holder reach the top of a career: 1 x +10 = +10

Having a spouse reach the top of their career: 0 x +20 = 0

Every 100,000$: 3 x +20 = +60

TOTAL: -1350

 

4.6 – Dandruff feels offended

jiT7d5f

HEY GUYS WELCOME BACK

Screenshot

Look, Diana has a new look! Several new looks, but you’ll see them as her insane trait makes her go through them.

Diana: It’s not like I have a pool to show off my swimsuit.

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Bunch of stuff this chapter, but we’ll start with the simple things! Getting rid of the kitties!

I’m only keeping my original ones, Diablo and Angelica, and two of their kids: Lucifer and Azazel.

Somebody asked for Aphrodite, Beelzebub and Icarus so here ya go. Just download them from here

Starting now it’s too late to ask for more kitties, they’re already all up for adoption!

Screenshot-3

And now for the fun part!

Diana: Ruuuufffuuuusss

(I’ll admit to actually thinking my game screwed with me and decided to reset the genie)

Screenshot-4

Diana: No hard feelings – just need to speed through this friendship thing.

Technically they should be forever bffs at this point, but every time she summons him their relationship is right back to zero T_T

Rufus: I’m not following what’s going on??

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Diana: I’m going to use a wish to free you.

Rufus: What?? You’d do that for me?

Diana: Was the last five hours we spent high fiving and chatting not proof enough?

Screenshot-6

Rufus: I don’t know if I want to live in a house like a human though.

EXCUSE ME

I’ve clicked Free the Genie THREE TIMES but he keeps deleting the action or something I DON’T KNOW ITS JUST NOT HAPPENING

Diana: Boi

*5 search minutes later*

Okay apparently Diana needs to have her opportunity slot open or else she can’t free him. GEESUS would’ve like to know that in advance.

Screenshot-7

Rufus: I’m just messing around! This makes me really happy, but can you freeze my lamp first, it’s a little toasty in here. I can’t concentrate.

Diana: Excuse me what now?

Screenshot-8

Rufus: It’s important! Our timing has to be perfect! So I’ll just go pack my stuff while you do that okay bye

Diana: *grumbles*

Screenshot-9

Rufus: TOO COLD TOO COLD

Diana: My gods your picky. Here I’ll warm it up. *puts it in oven*

Rufus: OKAY TOO WARM. What about a cold damp dark place like a catacombs.

Diana: This is getting annoying.

Screenshot-10

Rufus: Um what are you doing

Diana: Testing fate

Rufus: Oh okay, I’ll just wait here in my bottle, anxiously, impatiently-

Diana: Okay okay I’m going!

Screenshot-11

Meanwhile on the The Others

I know it’s a kitten and they called it Hazel BUT IT LOOKS LIKE ICARUS T-T

Screenshot-12

Diana: Okay Rufus. I did everything you asked. I stink and I’m dusty and now it’s time for you to do your part. Just one last summon.

Rufus: ….

Screenshot-13

OK THIS WAS KIND OF SWEET TO WATCH

Screenshot-14

Diana: Rufus

Rufus: AM I FREE I CANT TELL

Diana: Why are your eyes closed

Rufus: I’m about to open them with FREE eyes Diana, FREE

Screenshot-15

Rufus: The free world is gorgeous

Diana: >///> So umm you’re a neat innapropriate angler huh

Rufus: HOW DO YOU KNOW SO MUCH ABOUT ME

Diana: It’s in the portrait panel

Screenshot-16

Rufus: IM SO HAPPY THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR FREEING ME

Lacie2: Lol hi

Diana: Screw off Lacie I’m trying to enjoy this hug right here

Screenshot-17

Diana: So you can live at my house if you want but there are rules to –

Rufus: Look at all the stars! It all seems so different now. Never got to look at them.

Diana: Geesus hadn’t realized how bad you had it, if you couldn’t even appreciate stars.

Screenshot-18Screenshot-19 Screenshot-20

(Still the cutest interaction ever goodness)

Diana: Come here, let me show you the stars I know.

Screenshot-21

BUT I MEAN THIS IS MY ISBI

Ghost: HAHA MARTHA COME SEE LMAO it’s a weird couple stargazing COME SEE THIS QUICK

Rufus: They’re so shiinnnyy!

Diana: I decidedly hate this graveyard.

Screenshot-22

Now the final spouse test.

Can Rufus find his way home?

Rufus: Diana!? ;-;

Diana: YOU GOT THIS RUFUS

Ghost: Wait where ya going wheres da action

Zach-Galifinakis-Hair-Pull

This is pretty much where – after I spent hours rebuilding the house because I felt like it and I need space – where the game bugged on me. Slowly but surely stuff got slower, build mode got weird and glitchy, then I couldn’t select anything, couldn’t save anything, and when I tried to reload the game it kept crashing on the load screen.

Good thing I saved right before I freed Rufus.

FIGURES A GOOD THING WOULD RUIN MY GAME

I’m in actual pain now because I spent a shit ton of time on that house and I’d actually remembered to save halfway through that time, but it won’t load because that was in the middle of the everything is going wrong bug. I’m just suffering a lot right now.

I’m going to need several days to recover before I can get back in and work on this save again.

*a month later*

Considering I forgot everything and I don’t remember my suffering, let’s try this again.

Screenshot-23

I had an extra wish I didn’t make use of last time, but I DID THIS TIME. +100 000$

Which means +20 points!

Screenshot-24

 

TAKE TWO

In broad daylight. Mausoleum didn’t go too well this time.

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Rufus: Hi again! – *snorts*

Diana: Shut up I will beat your ass.

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Mr. The hopeless romantic with a good sense of humour was left on his own to complete the Can-he-get-home-on-his-own spouse test and this is the first thing he does.

Rufus: WHAT COLOR IS MY TONGUE. I cant see it

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Rufus wished to be a journalist so I used his one action to get him that job.

Rufus: I can document what human life is like now

Screenshot-28

Rufus: They were so nice :D, they gave me a coat cause they said I must be freezing!

The fact that he has one athletic skill already pleases me to no end.

Rufus: I will be the bestest paper boy there ever was

Screenshot-29

He made it home! *cue trumpets*

Diana: Thank god. I thought you’d lost yourself in the snow. I was about to go search for you.

Dandruff: The genie is here. Fascinating.

Rufus: LOOK THE HOUSE it changed

Speaking of! Let me give y’all a super quick tour

Screenshot-30

So left to right:

Bathroom, music room, work out room, bathroom, grand area, dining room, kitchen, living room.

And in the middle, the future nursery room *wink wink*

Screenshot-31

Second floor, left to right:

Diana’s bedroom, future boy’s room, stairway, bathroom, future boy’s room, dandruff’s room, balcony.

Also a random hole in the boy’s room for some reason???? I can’t get rid of it and I can’t put any floor on it 😡

Screenshot-32

Outside we have an outdoor recreation area covered by snow and a skilling shed.

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And on the left we have the observation deck.

Well. Bryce kept resetting on me and I got annoyed of his ass so I had him play around with the philosopher’s stone till he turned to gold.

Then because he’s unlucky he got brought back to life and kept resetting all over the place again so I master controlled his ass into the pit of nothing.

His statue now serves as warning. Maybe I’ll move it beside the cowplant later…

Screenshot-34

Diana: You took your sweet time coming back home so I gotta work in an hour, but if you’re a good boy when I get back…*eyebrow waggle*

Rufus: We could work out together??? You could train me again!!

Lucifer: Don’t mind me

Diana: If that’s what gets you going *wink*

Rufus: Ohhhh >///>

Diana: Anywho buh bye work

Screenshot-35

Rufus: I feel like eating cake! There was never any cake in that lamp.

Kelsey???: Yeah same, did you know your cake outside is expired. It smells like cow breath ew.

Screenshot-36

Rufus: She’s taking my cake! And I’m so hungry :(, maybe I should go fish

Rufus dear there’s fish in the fridge. I MEAN CAKE. Wow actually wrote fish first. Leaving that there I am.

Screenshot-37

Dandruff: He’s not doing anything. Can’t even get himself cake. He’s just eye candy isn’t he?

Probably

Rufus: I can hear you ya know

Screenshot-38

Well what’s this now

Rufus: Woah…woah…it turns…aaaaaaaaaa

Screenshot-39

Oh my god he hypnotized himself

HAHA WOW

Screenshot-40

Look at you! Found the fridge!

Rufus: THIS TASTES SO GOOOODD

I’m happy you’re so happy. Hope you’re ready cause Diana has the day off tomorrow and babies need to be made.

Screenshot-41

I mean it is Love Day tomorrow, what a perfect day to start the baby making. And with you having 60 days before adult and her 120 days before adult, imagine all the babies y’all could pop out.

I’m in depravation. I need the babies. As many as needed.

Screenshot-42

Are u okay

Rufus: Oh god we haven’t even kissed yet I mean does she even want babies shouldn’t marriage happen first does she even really like me that way cause I mean I do but its not that obvious with her I mean maybe that was flirting but I don’t know like I want to hold her hand sometimes and

Ok stop stop its okay Rufus. It will be absolutely fine and dandy don’t you worry your tush.

Screenshot-43

Kelsey the hood decided to stay over and do her homework.

Angelica: Food….foood……where is mah fooooooooddd

Screenshot-43

I don’t know how I feel about this

Screenshot-44

But hey look! Rufus on his first day to work!

Flying in genie style 😀

*later*

Screenshot-45

Rufus: OH WE HAD TO DRESS UP?

Diana: I can’t say this outfit suits you as much

Dandruff: Oh it’s a date thing isn’t it. It’s going to get awkward isn’t it

Rufus: A date???

Screenshot-46

Diana: Look, thing is I’m kind of a legacy sim and I gotta produce offspring at some pont and I kinda of totally chose you because well obvious reasons, but if you don’t want to have anything to do with me that way (even though I totally freed you btw) tell me now before it’s too late

Dandruff: It got weird bye now

Rufus: Are you kidding? You’re hot and perfect and funny and cute and I can’t believe you actually want me and *voice cracks* I MEAN

Screenshot-47

Rufus: I’m all yours baby. Just be gentle *winks*

Diana: *dies a little*

Screenshot-48

Diana: Get over here you *smooch*

Apparently romance is happening and it’s amusing

Dandruff: *gags in bg*

Screenshot-49

Look at this woman dipping this very muscular man with her flimsy arms in front of the future nursery like it’s nothing.

Screenshot-50

They managed a few face melds and an official title to their relationship before they needed to head off to take care of their needs.

So no babies.

For now 😀

Screenshot-51

HE STILL FOUND HER BED ALL ON HIS OWN THOUGH

Cute

Screenshot-52

Diana: I could get used to this. Too bad you gotta work ;P

Since they do have a WHOLE lot of days before they grow up into adults…I thought I’d do something else.

I would make them try for baby unless they both wish for a kid. Until then though, risky woohoo. Which is at 10% in my game I think?

Screenshot-53

Meanwhile, I get Diana working on that plumbot again!

Though actually, I’m starting to wonder if she needs to buy a plumbot in the future and then add traits with this machine…

*reaches level 2*

Oh nevermind she can build plumbots lol

Screenshot-54

I’ve never made a plumbot before!

That was fuuuunnn!

Diana: HAHA, I am a super villain after all. I need mindless minions.

Lilipad: These are – I am – I will serve you master.

Diana: Yes you will.

Screenshot-55

Lilipad: Master I would like to scan you. I am afraid for your legs.

Diana: Everything’s fine Lilipad

I doubt that

Screenshot-56

Rufus: AND IT’S NOT FAIR I mean I just got off work and she’s off to work and I just want to spend time with her I mean we totally agreed to spend the rest of our lives together but there’s not much spending going on-

Dandruff: HOW IS THIS MY FAULT

Rufus: It isn’t I just needed to rant

Dandruff: How about rant to SOMEONE ELSE

Screenshot-57

Stove: EXCUSE ME MY POWER

Lilipad: I need it more than you do

Stove: ITS MINE GIVE IT BACK

Lilipad: You’re plugged into the wall!

Screenshot-58

*me waiting for Rufus to eat the mac and cheese he burnt because he’s starving*

*Looks through window*

Are u serious what

Rufus: Did the neighbors just get get aliennapped in front of us

Yes

Rufus: The free world is weird

Screenshot-59

SHE DID IT OH MY GOD

With a total of 458$ an hour! Ahhhhh!

I changed the rules a while ago so I get points for this YEEHAW +10

And I managed it before babies oh hell yes

Screenshot-60

Diana: Finally we both have two days off! Now that you’re awake we can spend some time together.

Rufus: You should’ve woken me up the moment you got home ;-;

Diana: nah you looked passed out

Screenshot-61

And then Diana stripped down because she felt bad for Rufus being the only one half-naked lol

But yes finally, their schedules let them be together whilst their mood is in the green!

Ze risky woohoo can finally begin

Screenshot-62

Rufus: I am ready! Take me

Diana: oh my god get in the shower now

Screenshot-63

Don’t know if it worked I have my sound off!

Screenshot-64

Or if this one did

Screenshot-65

Or this one 😛

Screenshot-66

Diana: NOOO NOT THE FOOD I JUST ATE

I’m guessing one of those three worked!

Screenshot-67

Yup

Diana: Ah sweet baby girl, you were created in the bot machine right? I bet it was the bot machine.

It’s a bit early to tell the gen-

Diana: IT’S A GIRL I SAID SO

Ok ok!

Screenshot-68

Diana: Honey dear blue man genie Rufus

Rufus: Oh wow

Diana: I’m pregnant.

Screenshot-69

Rufus: Alright! We did a good job *thumbs up*

Diana: Well I did all the work

Rufus: What!? No! I was-

Diana: I’m kidding! 😛

Screenshot-70

Dandruff: I don’t understand. They’re not married. Why am I his niece.

Rufus: Your sister and I are just that close.

Probably the fact that there’s a baby on the way or something

Screenshot-71

Diana: aaahhhh thank god. This baby’s been pulling on my spine like it’s a doorbell.

WillTheZombie: *makes a bunch of dying noises*

Diana: Did I hear something?

Rufus: No no nothing *ahem* nothing at all just relax

Screenshot-72

Woah

I did not know this was a thing

Probably doesn’t affect her at this point though right? Then again if we have multiples we know why! Haha

Rufus: *suddenly wants to marry her*

Screenshot-73

Diana: *wishes to marry him too* I just really want to see him in a tux

Lilipad: GIVE ME ZE POWER

Lamp: but why. Im just a candle

Screenshot-74

So I just sped through this pregnancy because I was having too much with the nanite machine oops

Diana: EITHER WAY BABY IS COMING OUT NOW

Screenshot-75

Diana: RUFUS

Rufus: Making waffles love!

Diana: 😡

Screenshot-76

Rufus: I made a bunch too! Do you want some?

Diana: OHGDAKNSCNAKJ just give me a sec geesus

Screenshot-77

Welcome the first baby of generation 4! +5

This is Enzo Idanezy, a blue vampire who loves the heat and is completely bonkers.

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He likes kids music, Ceviche and his fav color is LILAC

 

Screenshot-79

Lilipad: What is this, it’s so cute.

Diana: I know. I did a fantabular job didn’t I?

He looks like such a calm and serious baby though so not a girl

Diana: Shut up, next one is a girl I swear. I just foresaw stuff too much in advance.

Screenshot-80

Oh wow look lots of fairies

DANDRUFF DID YOU JUST STEAL MY BABY POINTS

-5

Screenshot-81

Serious tho Dandruff stop it

-5

Screenshot-82

Rufus: Id like to meet my son PLZ

Dandruff: the crying baby needs attention you’re in the way bot

Lilipad: SO MUCH NOISE it’s MY precious child to take care of its so cute its mine

Screenshot-83

Dandruff: Guess auntie gets to hold you first!

Rufus: *extreme sad face*

Screenshot-84

Rufus: What is the point of her in this house???? Apart from STEALING MY OWN SON

I agree

Dandruff: I take offense

Screenshot-85

Diablo, the kitty daddy, decided to age up in the darkness.

He’s an elder now.

So that’s that

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Dandruff: What is going on here. I was standing all right in my corner. Don’t do this in front of me.

Screenshot-87

Dandruff: I CAN HEAR YOU YOU KNOW

Screenshot-88

Dandruff: Geesus

Diana: Even though you have a really ugly yellow hat on, I’m keeping you forever

Rufus: Even though you have a real mean trait, happen to be the emperor of evil, and kick me when we sleep, you’re mine.

Screenshot-89

The honeymoon was spent in the hot tub.

Good place as any to stop this chapter I say

😛

 

 

Self-wetting: 76 x -5 = -380

Failing school : 7 x -5 = -35

NPC visit: 4 x -5 = -20

Passing Out: 234 x -5 = -1170

Accidental Deaths: 5 x -10 = -50

Social Worker Visit: 0 x -15 = 0

Birth: 8 x +5 = +40

Twin Birth: 3 x +10 = +30

Triplet Birth: 0 x +15 = 0

Quad Birth: 1 x +20 = +20

Fulfilling LTW: 3 x +40 = +120

5-star celebrity: 0 x +5 = 0

Honour roll: 0 x +5 = 0

Randomizing every LTW choice and trait (apart from the obligational insane trait) for a whole generation of children: 3 x +10 = +30

Portrait of the torch holders somewhere in the house: 4 x +5 = +20

Having the Torch Holder reach the top of a career: 1 x +10 = +10

Having a spouse reach the top of their career: 0 x +20 = 0

Every 100,000$: 3 x +20 = +60

TOTAL: -1325

 

4.5 – The Lacies

Screenshot

JAMES WHITELIGHT YOU ARE UNDER ARREST

For wearing such horrible clothes wtf

So you’ve probably all forgotten, but a while ago Diana got an opportunity to befriend James, so here we are finally.

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Diana: Dad stop laughing at me. IS THERE SOMETHING ON MY FACE. STOP IT.

This is going swimmingly.

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Diana: Hey dad did you see, my teeth grew out! LOOK AT THEM! Aren’t they pretty?? Bet you don’t have any. Bet you’re like all the other glitched vampires in town. Bet I’m the only true vampire.

 

Screenshot-4

Diana: Well shit

This is my James we’re talking about.

This is ironic though…considering in my serious story he actually ain’t got no fangs.

Screenshot-5

And then James peed himself in front of Lacie the paparazzi and left.

Diana: YOUR SON DIED LIKE A FEW HOURS AGO. STAY AND TALK TO YOUR DAUGHTER.

James: *leaves anyway*

I’m going to imagine none of this happened.

Screenshot-6

We did manage to swipe a car before this place closed though! So all’s good.

I’m very happy.

Screenshot-7

Diana: Aunt Carly what happened to your face

Carly: I’m a vampire now

Diana: That’s not what I meant.

Carly: 😡

Sims are being turned it seems.

Screenshot-8

I don’t want him to die on me every day, I mean I did promise the observation of a jerkwad in captivity, so I bought him a snow machine.

Bryce: Yay.

Screenshot-9

Rhamnus Buckthorn is haunting the torn up newspaper.

Rham: FEAR ME

He’s the real deal guys

Screenshot-10

We REALLY need some kind of maid.

I wanted to wait till Diana was done her LTW, but this might call for some earlier doing.

Screenshot-11

YEEEESSSS

LEVEL 6

YEESSSS

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That’s super cute dear

Let’s go steal some cars. It’s the only way you can get closer to your soulmate.

Diana: >_>

Screenshot-13

Lacie : Three star celebrity dumpster diving I see *jots*

Diana: FDIAOKSDS *throws trash at her*

It’s not late enough to steal and the dumpsters looked inviting heh

Screenshot-14

Lacie: Smile for the picture darling!

Diana: YOU KNOW WHAT *stinky as hell*

Screenshot-15

Diana: IF YOU DON’T STOP FOLLOWING ME I’M GOING TO GO TO YOUR HOUSE AND BURN YOUR LACE LACIE

Lacie: NO not my lace!

Screenshot-16

Diana: Wait where do you live

Lacie: Uh

Diana: Are you a hobo

Screenshot-17

Lacie: YOURE MEAN I’M leaving to go home on the bench near the diner

Diana: Drat she escaped

Maybe we could rob those cars now huh

(AND WE DID SO MUCH CASH)

Screenshot-18

Look I found another car

AND NOBODY MOVE

IT’S A UNICORN

Screenshot-19

Oh my god look at that rainbow

I want to cheat and add the unicorn to the household so bad, but…that’s what I’ve always done. Never managed to actually adopt a unicorn.

Time to put my simming skills to test.

Screenshot-20

The stalking is going great

Horse: ‘nother human man those are so annoying

Unicorn: I smell food on it. Don’t scare it away.

Screenshot-21

Diana: Hi is it hand sniffing time can I approach

Horse1: OH MY GOD IT’S A HUMAN EW KILL IT WITH FIRE

Horse2: what now

Screenshot-22

Horse2: OH M GEE RUN AWAY

Unicorn: *le sigh*

Diana: Pretty horsie

Screenshot-23

Unicorn: Okay I’ve sniffed hallelujah where’s the food?

Diana: Well don’t you have attitude

Look who’s talking

Screenshot-24

Diana: Here I have an atrocious amount of apples in my inventory for some reason.

Unicorn: OOOOOHHH

Screenshot-25

Unicorn: Okay twas fun bye now

NOOOO WE WERE JUST SOCIALIZING

Next time, next time

Screenshot-26

Dandruff: I can’t take it anymore, I’m cleaning this up.

Athena: Careful kid! You just spilled some of your dad on me

Oops, somebody left Cédric on the floor. Really need to clean this place.

Screenshot-27

Athena and Lucifer look so alike I’m always confused at first so I gave them color collars.

I really was confused because I gave the wrong collar to Lucifer the first time around.

Athena is the orange one :p

 

Screenshot-28

Diana: CARLY WAKE UP AND GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE. I want to steal that not suspicious cop car at all and your presence prevents me from doing so.

Carly: jesus Christ okay bye

Turns out it’s our cop car, oops haha

Screenshot-29

EXCUSE ME

-5

Screenshot-30

Bad Bryce Gorman

BAD

Screenshot-31

-5

She looks like sleeping beauty

Dandruff: 😀

And she’s just as useful

Dandruff: 😡

Screenshot-32

Haha! I love the wording on this!

And it’s so true. I SHOULD WISH FOR WISHES OOOH

Maybe I could wish for points

Screenshot-33

The Lacies have doubled. O_O

Lacie: So heard you’re getting arrested right now. How do you feel about this?

Diana: SHuck

YEAH LIKE THE COPS ARE HERE

Screenshot-34

Diana: Got a car just like this one you know. Where’s your uniform?

Cop: Urm forgot it at the dry cleaners

Screenshot-35

Diana: *rubbing lamp like crazy* I’LL FREE YOU IF YOU GET ME OUT OF HERE RUFUS

Rufus: Nuuuu that’s illegal

Screenshot-36

Rosemarie: OH MY GOD WHAT IS THIS PLACE. Dandruff your house is scary what’s with all the HUNGRY COWPLANTS OMG

Dandruff: Why do I invite people over

I don’t know. They always just stay on the porch.

Screenshot-37

Second set of kitties grew up!

That’s Azazel

Screenshot-38

And Icarus

Good thing too, cause Angelica is pregnant with batch #3

Screenshot-39

Azazel: And she’s eating ALL OUR FOOD because of it

Lucifer: Dad we need to talk about adding more to our family AGAIN. Weren’t we your favs??

Diablo: I got no say in this boys

Angelica: NOM NOM

Screenshot-40

Okay then, summon him behind the cowplant.

Diana: don’t want anyone seeing okay

No no I get it

Screenshot-41

Rufus: Hhheeeyyyy looks like you made it out of jail

Diana: 😡

Rufus : heh…

Wrong move Rufus

Screenshot-42

Diana: Okay so I just summoned you cause I wanna wish for more wishes

Rufus: …………..

Diana: ITS NOT CHEATING OKAY it’s a totally legit wish

Rufus: Well alright then *claps hands*

YESH. I’m sure this’ll be very useful. (for like instant friendship when the time to free him comes)

Rufus: You stink btw

Screenshot-43

Diana: BE A MAN DON’T USE THE HANDLEBARS

Rufus: But this is how I got buff arms

Diana: BY BEING A COWARD? WORK THE SWEAT OUT. Then you can stink as much as I do

Rufus: OK OK!

Screenshot-44

It’s field trip time at the theatre for Dandruff

Dandruff: EXCUSE ME LIKE NO OKAY I NEED EVERYONE TO UNDERSTAND. That I have the good trait and am in no way related to the Idanezys. Just for you know future reference.

Screenshot-45

Angie gave birth to just one kitten this time, but it’s got her eeyyyess!

It’s a little girl named Aphrodite.

Screenshot-46

It’s official! Level 7 of her career reached! Yash

Let’s celebrate with some swiping

Diana: And I mean if they just leave their barbecuee out in the open how can I not?

That and nobody leaves their cars out in the open anymore.

Screenshot-47

And then we can’t steal nothing else because this guy decided to start a concert.

Diana: *lines up heckle actions*

Nah let’s just go somewhere else.
Screenshot-48

So I was just staring Dandruff while Diana slept, waiting for her to do something interesting per usual when I noticed something REALLY weird

Like a little freaky

Screenshot-49

HER RIGHT HAND

Her fingers are elongated like claws, I can’t, you poor thing

 

Screenshot-50

Does it hurt?

Dandruff: a little bit but im used to it now ;-;

I’ve never seen this before ever

Screenshot-51

QUICK

An unattended sloppy jalopy! Take it before someone notices we’re here!

Screenshot-52

I should stop spamming you guys with cats but I’ve never really had cats for a long time or pets in general in sims, so I’m just gushing over them.

Azazel chilling out and Aphrodite looking cute af

Screenshot-53

Oh my god why did I not think of this sooner! The museum has a bunch of expensive stuff to swipe!

Also observe, Diana’s promotions finally get her a more decent outfit. Well at least no one can recognize her as easily.

Screenshot-54

ALSO WOOT WOOT GUYS WOOT WOOT

That right there is the halfway mark. I repeat we have reached the halfway mark. Rejoice! It’s downhill from here!

I’m excited to actually get this generation started so I’m trying my best to speed through this LTW.

Screenshot-55

Angie gave birth again!

LOOK PINK KITTENS THIS TIME

Screenshot-56

This creepy angry looking one is a boy named Beelzebub

Screenshot-57

And this is a boy too, Zagiel.

Ok maybe I’ll stop now.

I got so many of these kittens right now if any of y’all like one of these cats and wants me to put them up for download say so now before my game does something to them.

Also I’ll probably be giving up a few for adoption soon…like only keeping one from each set. (as heartbreaking as that will be, but portrait panel sort of just died on me)

Screenshot-58

I’m actually so mean aren’t I?

Bryce: Does this mean I can go home

No.

Screenshot-59

Because she’s awesome Diana is now lvl 8 in her career and- uhhhh

Diana: And that’s another interrogation/torture well done.

I don’t wanna know to be honest.

Screenshot-60

Oh.

OH.

Oh my

I thought the ghosts were feeding it. My bad. I’ve never had a cowplant die in my game though, so first time for everything?

Only one cowplant left.

Screenshot-61

NOPE NOPE NOPE

Diana we’re so close WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO ME

Diana: It’s taking too long. I’m done with Cameron being my boss and Carly being a coworker who won’t stop texting me.

Le sigh *waits to fill the space with another wish*

 

Screenshot-62

Azazel: Human it is time for the feeding

Dandruff: It’s all I do. ITS ALL I EVER DO. Feed the cats

Yeah I know, it’s really boring.

Screenshot-63

So Bryce froze haha

Probaby won’t see him again till he thaws in the spring XD

Screenshot-64

Is it me or have the plasma juice boxes arranged themselves in a smile??

My god the trash is coming to life!

I’d love to show you guys more interesting stuff but the days really just consist of Diana going to work till 3am, then swiping as much as she can, then sleeping till she needs to go work again. And Dandruff feeds the cats.

With Desmond gone and Cat and Cédric dead there’s no one else to entertain us apart from the cats.

Screenshot-65

Because this is the sort of stuff we need in your back pocket right now Diana.

Diana: It’s not going to come and bite me in the ass later. Nope.

Screenshot-66

WOW

LIKE I’d take that “average” bonus

Diana: *just mastered athletic skill like right now*

Screenshot-67

Dandruff: I’m so BOOOORRREEEDD

Diana: I invited you to come play with me.

Dandruff: Chess? Like plz no. I’ll just go pee for like five hours

Athena: HUMAN EXCUSE ME WHERE IS DA FOOD

Dandruff: UGH

Oh hey look at that, your birthday is tomorrow I hadn’t even realized Dandy dear.

Screenshot-68

Dandruff: AH YES I was about to rip my hair out of boredom BUT GROWING UP YES SO MANY POSSIBILITIES

One more step to kicking you out!

Though at this point I really don’t mind your presence. I don’t need to bother with feeding the cats.

Screenshot-69

Diana : I can’t swipe. My uncle Chance can see me from AAALLLL the way over there. You know, past the building between us

Chance: Ze pretty snow

*facepalm*

Screenshot-70

It’s da birthday!

And Brittney decided to stick around for it 😀

Screenshot-71

Bryce: This is not okay. I wanted to see that birthday but someone locked the tiny gate.

I see you made a snowman to express your feelings.

Screenshot-72

Brittney: OH hell naw that ain’t my descendant im out of here

Dandruff: I’m so disappointed why

Added trait Loves the cold

Screenshot-73

>:P

I admit to having a lot of fun using Dandruff as a guinea pig for a bunch of new cc I got

Screenshot-74

Good thing I spent so much time on her look cause she’s still got

34 DAYS AS A TEEN

Feahdsajcnkaj

I sure hope we’re done Diana’s LTW by then. She’ll probably be producing offspring by then!

Screenshot-75

Also Aphrodite had her birthday today too.

She’s not as pretty as the others.

Screenshot-76

Dandruff come on, I gave you cool headphones, why you gotta do this to me

-5

Screenshot-77

Maybe we should train these cats instead of keeping them around cause they’re cute…

Zagiel: HAHAHAHA DESTRUCTION

>.>

Screenshot-78

There’s an abandoned car in the middle of the road. Too bad we can’t swipe that.

DIDN’T SCREENSHOT IT, but we’re at over 30 000$ now!

Screenshot-79

I’m surprised you’ve managed to survive on just snow cones. I’m sure I played a good week or two since you’ve robbed us.

Bryce: There’s just you and me snow cone

I mean, winter actually came and gone.

Screenshot-80

I’m very disappointed, but at least your job got the color coding sort of right this time.

Diana: I have a mask, that’s all that counts.

Screenshot-81

OH YES

Level 9 in her career!

Screenshot-82

What?? Already 40 000$??? Why this chapter is taking awhile to make BECAUSE I’m speeding through weeks and weeks of sim playing to finish up this LTW.

(plus some houses are mysteriously getting new cars that I can swipe) I have no patience and everyone’s run out of lamps

Soooooonnnnn

Screenshot-83

Meanwhile the last batch of kitties is growing up!

Beelzebub is encountering some difficulties.

Athena: Oops did I just open the door in your face my bad

Screenshot-84

You scare me

Beelzebub: I’m still stuck

Screenshot-85

And that’s Zagiel!

Screenshot-86

Buuuut I have a favorite T^T

I’ll probably end up giving all the other kitties for adoption next chapter

Screenshot-87

Except Azazel 😀

I just really like his coloring!

Screenshot-88

And Lucifer too. Might just keep those two.

Lucifer: HEY DID YA HEAR THAT, I’m preferred to Aphrodite!

Screenshot-89

Diana: Smells weird

Azazel: Ahhhh sweet relief

The house is dirty enough as it is!

Screenshot-90

I was wondering where you were

Dandruff: Why don’t you just build a bed here already so I can just live here jeesus

Screenshot-91

Dandruff: Maybe I’ll go play catch with Bryce…oh wait he can’t leave. 😛

Bryce: *walks into door* YOU’RE MEAN

Screenshot-92

Hey look its Bowser!

Diana: WITH LITTLE PONYTAILS HAHA. Now screw off so I scan swipe stuff

Bowser: > 😦

Screenshot-93

That night swiping went really well.

DOWN TO THE LAST 5 GRAND

*intense breathing*

Screenshot-94

This is where Diella lives (remember, Diana’s purple haired sister? We can sort of see her in the window)

We gotta choose where we swipe the last 5 grand carefully after all!

Diana: She’s sooo gonna miss this lamp

Screenshot-95

Her and Bowser? Hahaha oh yeah I’d forgotten about that notification XD

They’ve both suffered with hair problems BECAUSE OTHER SIMS AGE. It’s been so long since Diana grew up but being a vampire, she’s not even ¼ to adult!

Screenshot-96

Diella: Oh. YOU.

Diana: My gods. I thought you had white eyes. What is happening with everyone

No really, she didn’t have red eyes before????

Screenshot-97

Diella: LIFE HAPPENS *leaves to go woohoo Boswer*

Well okay that was weird

Diana: Tell me about it, what was up with her face??

Story Progression was not kind to my Diella.

Diana: Anyway, how about we get back to what’s really important now?

Screenshot-98

Diana: Me swiping her chairs.

I clicked in front of the tv, THE TV IS BETTER

Diana: Please. How do you think we got to 45 grand? With you choosing what we swiped?

Yes.

(Still managed to get a grand, so we’re done to 4 grand left T^T!)

Screenshot-99

TONIGHT IS THE NIGHT LADIES AND GENTLEMAN. I have found easy targets, I should be finishing up the LTW this very NIGHT. AHHH. Never done this LTW before and that is 40 POINTS MY WAY.

But while we wait, since apparently she gets the weekends off, I’m getting Diana to start working on that bot-maid this house desperately needs.

Screenshot-100

Diana: Geesus christ Lacie wtf are you doing here

Lacie2: I’m actually Annabelle not Lacia

Diana: You’re all Lacies to me.

Screenshot-101

Diana: You want to sneak into my backyard and take pictures of me in my swimsuit while I design nanites? Fine. But you gotta be there tonight to document me finishing my LTW

Lacie2: That’s not really news

Diana: I’m deeply insulted right now

Hey guys, I’m kind of reading a 100 baby ISBI challenge at the same time and it kind of struck me that with Diana being a vampire I could probably totally attempt this for her.

Wouldn’t it be funny and messy? You guys would have 100 sims to choose from for the next heir!

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Diana: How about no

But I miss having kids in this house-

Diana: HOW ABOUT THROW THAT IN THE TRASH

Ok fine geez

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GUYS I DID IT LOOK 30 000 LIFE POINTS

Diana: You mean I did it

AAHHHH +40 PTS

AHHHHHHHHHHH

*continues screaming for another hour*

My gods this took forever! I can FINALLY get this generation off its ass! Oh my god!

BUT

Not this chapter haha

But lots of good things to look forwards to next chap

Like me giving Diana a new look, cause I’ve really grown bored of it. (downloaded a ton of CC since too)

And then beginning the RUFUS conquest.

Such good things, such excitement

Also getting rid of some kitties cause my game is slowing down >_>

 

 

Self-wetting: 76 x -5 = -380

Failing school : 6 x -5 = -30

NPC visit: 4 x -5 = -20

Passing Out: 233 x -5 = -1165

Accidental Deaths: 5 x -10 = -50

Social Worker Visit: 0 x -15 = 0

Birth: 7 x +5 = +35

Twin Birth: 3 x +10 = +30

Triplet Birth: 0 x +15 = 0

Quad Birth: 1 x +20 = +20

Fulfilling LTW: 3 x +40 = +120

5-star celebrity: 0 x +5 = 0

Honour roll: 0 x +5 = 0

Randomizing every LTW choice and trait (apart from the obligational insane trait) for a whole generation of children: 3 x +10 = +30

Portrait of the torch holders somewhere in the house: 4 x +5 = +20

Having the Torch Holder reach the top of a career: 0 x +10 = 0

Having a spouse reach the top of their career: 0 x +20 = 0

Every 100,000$: 2 x +20 = +40

TOTAL: -1315

I tweaked the rules again to give me a little more chance at positive points.

4.4 – Bryce Gorman

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Round numbers make me happy

Look at all those souls I’ve contaminated

(hey look you’ve got an approximate of when I started writing this chapter haha)

Now where did we leave off?

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OH YEAH, Desie was LEAVING me

Desmond: Very far away plz and as soon as possible

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Desmond: Bye dad, bye sis

Cédric: I don’t know who that traitor is

Dandruff: Can’t even be bothered to cook us some pancakes before he leaves. *spits on ground*

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Desmond: I don’t understand…after everything I did for this household…*sniffle*

IM SORRY IM NOT MAD DON’T LEAVE

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Desmond: Haha kidding I hate you

GET OUT

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Desie lives here now. I’ve memorized the place so I can send Diana to go rob him later.

Desmond: I’m telling the guys to set up an alarm system.

WHO SHALL BE THE QUICKEST I WONDER

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Athena: HOLY MOTHER OF GOD WHO IS THAT

It’s illegal to be so cute

Athena: THAT’S SO LAME OMG

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Lucifer looks like he’s in a constant state of laughing at people

Lucifer: Heh hehehehe hehhehehhehhe

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Loook what we got in the mail ;P

Aren’t you so happy Diana?

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Diana: I DON’T KNOW WHAT YOURE TALKING ABOUT THIS IS PROBABLY A PRANK WHAT IS THIS SHIT LIKE HUH I DON’T CARE

Your lack of fangs is annoying me *opens cas*

Diana: why are you changing subjects

Oh you wanted me to stay on it?

Diana: NOPE

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IF YOU DIE I SWEAR TO GOD

Angelica: If she dies I will take her place as master of this household

Diana: I got this you two

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I can’t get enough of these cats

Like aahhhhhhh

Angelica: I’m giving birth to two more if you’re interested

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OMG

AAHH

Similar coloring, but they don’t got the same faces, still cute af

Both little boys this time

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This is Icarus

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And this is Azazel

I’ll wait till Athena and Lucifer grow up before I get more kitties. YES MOAR, the designs are just really nice. And maybe we can get something a little more different?

It’s not like Diana is producing offspring

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Diana: Does it look like I have the time!? And it wasn’t my decision

Hey look, your fangs loaded

Diana: DONT CHANGE THE SUBJECT

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*listening to Mad Mad world just as picture is taken*

Icarus: *singing* I WANT TO DROWN MY SORROWS

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I just realized something

My baby Cameron is Diana’s boss!?!?!?!

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GODDAMN IT

They sent me the one opportunity I can’t refuse

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What the ever loving fuck

Who the hell

What are you

EXCUSE ME

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Cédric: Look. A burglar.

AND DIANA IS AT WORK

Beat him up Cédric

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Dandruff: Ah such excitement, a burglar. Hello burglar.

Bryce: This is surprisingly easy. I should come here more often.

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SERVES YOU RIGHT BASTARD

Bryce: My head’s stuck

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This isn’t the time right now STORY PROGRESSION

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IM GOING TO REMEMBER YOUR NAME BRYCE GORMAN

I WILL REMEMBER

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Cédric: It’s okay. I got this. Stealing my bed? Big no no man

Bryce: Ah I’m done here

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Cédric: Oh m gee he escaped with my bed!

You’re a useless pile of trash

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Dandruff: He robbed us. Such tragedy.

Go to hell, both of you.

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NO NOT THE STATUE

OH my god at this point I’m ready to lose 10 pts to call the police

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DIANA

Diana: Humph amateur

Bryce: Ohohoho

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OIHFDAKLSDKA

-5

Diana: He ran off…like a coward…too quick…

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He keeps stealing

He won’t stop

I’m dying on my computer

SOMEONE STOP HIM PLEASE

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AW HELL NO

NOT MY TIME MACHINE

*adds sim to household*

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Oops, suddenly he’s imprisoned with a hungry cowplant?

I wonder how that happened? *eye twitch*

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Bryce: That’s fine! These guns are more than enough to break this glass!

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Bryce: On the other hand…I’m a little hungry…

Coco: *wiggles cake*

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Bryce: how convenient! Food!

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Popup: Coco can’t bring itself to eat the outdoors enthusiast

Of starvation or by cowplant JUST KILL HIM

This goddamn robber destroyed everyone’s mood because they couldn’t do anything for the 6 hours straight he was robbing us OIHFQOKJDKASJNCA

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Dandruff: You can’t hide it anymore dad, I know you’re a VAMPIRE

Cédric: What!? Who told you??

Dandruff: No one. I figured it out ALL ON MY OWN

The interactions sometimes

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Aw hon that’s cute, but we can’t. Got work soon.

Diana: I DON’T KNOW WHAT MY WISHES ARE DOING

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So the cowplants weren’t working, he kept feeding them before they could eat him.

So I stuck the jellybean bush in with him.

Bryce: I just want a burger

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Whut

Haha HAHAHAHAHA

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Oh the irony *wipes tear* it’s too much

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He eats a jellybean!

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And a disappointing result occurs.

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No serious, my game is having fun right now

The irony is just splashed all over this guy

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What? So I put some essentials in his prison…

Not like I want him to make me lose more points than necessary T_T

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Diana got promoted to Lvl 5 so in celebration I sent her to rob Desmond, but it was too late and no one let her in.

Diana: Look Desie! I’m stealing your 200$ outdoor lamps!

Desmond: Yeah ok have fun

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Finally something I buy is used!

ITS SO CUTE TOO

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My game actually cannot stop itself right now

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Excuse me mister, is this what you call work?

Cédric: I feel bad I didn’t catch the burglar so ill catch a fish instead

No, you’re burning, come home.

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Diana: Apparently the social worker is going to pick you up if we don’t socialize.

Dandruff: It’s not like nobody saw this neglect coming now that Desmond is gone

I’m considering losing the pts and letting the social worker take you.

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Diana: So here, take out the trash. Socializing done.

Dandruff: Wow. What a wonderful conversation.

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Dandruff: I wouldn’t forget that I’m going to be here for a long time if I were you. Long enough to see your children be born. T_T

Why are you looking at me? Stop it

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Diana: Guess what? I got the day off Desie >:D

Desmond: I’m warning you, I live with some mega buff people. Don’t try anything.

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Diana: Not like I’m here to steal his stuff! Just want to try upgrading a stove and I don’t want to risk making my house explode.

In actuality, it’s not late enough to steal haha

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And then Cédric died

*huge disappointed sigh*

Cédric: I didn’t catch any….fish…

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Athena: Something smells fishy and dead. I like it.

Are you serious?? -10

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I WANTED BRYCE TO DIE NOT YOU

Cédric: I can go join Catarina now!

Sure vamps live forever, but they’re damn hard to keep alive.

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Apparently the house is so dirty even Death felt the need to clean up.

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Meanwhile Diana waited for Desmond to sleep so she could excitedly steal more of his lamps.

Diana: Enough of these should get me to 50 000$

I don’t think all the lamps in town equal 50 000$

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Diana: oh no my half-brother died SOB

OH NO

Not mourning

Wait, I got just the thing to cheer you up.

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Rufus: Hey look that work out machine is still there. I wanna try it again!

Diana: IM IN DEEP EMOTIONAL PAIN RIGHT HERE

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Rufus: Right sorry *hugs*

Diana: IM SO TIRED OF EVERYONE DYING LIKE WTF

Rufus: Heh this reminds me of when we met for the first time, you know when your mom died the first time?

Diana: NO I REMEMBER THAT

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Rufus: You still have a wish left, want me to bring him back to life?

Diana: ………..no…………

He’d probably starve himself to death again. Had a vampire sim who died three times in a row. Only got revived because of his unlucky trait.

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Diana: You’re making a cute face stop it

Rufus: Sorry?

DARN MY WAITING RULES

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Am I the only convinced he needs to be the spouse??

LIKE GUYS IS IT JUST ME OR

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Lucifer: It’s a GEEEENNIIIIEEE I want a genie for my bday which happens to be today. IS THAT MY GENIE?

Sorry no….I doubt I’ll finish Diana’s LTW today…

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Bryce: WAAAH GOOD OLD CÉDRIC DIED

You didn’t even know him.

And how the hell are you still alive?

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Don’t do this to me child ;-; -5

Dandruff: I’ve resorted to this for attention

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Bryce: I JUST REALIZED IM LOCKED IN. SOMEONE HELP ME.

Took you long enough

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Bryce: *sobs* ALL I WANTED WAS SOME CASH

Your death is nearing, I anticipate it.

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Bryce: Huh? A weird sound woke me up??

The sound of your imminent death

Bryce: plz stop

No I’m serious

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Bryce: MY STOMACH. IM DYING. HOW COULD YOU.

HOW DARE YOU MAKE THAT FACE. You deserved this.

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Grim: Errr

Don’t ask

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Grim: I CANT BELIEVE YOU GOT YOURSELF CAUGHT, you should be ashamed, as a criminal. You’re my fav types you know.

Bryce: I’m sorry ;-;

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Grim: *le sigh* You had one job Bryce. You were created for one purpose. Rob the Idanezys.

Bryce: but I did –

Grim: But I pity you and your prison

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Bryce: Oh m gee thank you grim! You liberated me from my prison!

EXCUSE ME

Grim: I’d run if I were you

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Bryce: Ah shit

HOW DARE

Stupid unlucky trait, IS IT IMPOSSIBLE TO KILL YOU LIKE

*fumes*

And no this does not count as an accidental death 😡

I’ll take care of you later Bryce

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As mentioned earlier it’s da kitties bdays today!

Starting with Athena

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Athena: NOM NOM NOM

I actually thought that was her true form for a moment there

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This is Athena all grown up 🙂

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And Lucifer!

They’re very similar, but I think Lucifer is prettier.

Ok so I changed some stuff, mostly backyard stuff, because all of it was annoying me a lot.

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We’ve got a nice official cat area now!

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To the left we have the observation of the Idiot Who Tried To Rob The Idanezys. If he’s sleeping or doing boring stuff there’s some chess, tv and a trampoline to keep you occupied.

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On the right we have a mashup area only my heir will probably access.